Special K Diet: Day 2, Bowl 1

Ok, so about to consume the first bowl of Day 2's Special K cereal allotment. (Technically, going to eat it after I read The Upper Room story for the day.)

Didn't the Special K diet used to be simple? Something like, substitute one bowl of cereal in place of one meal. Or, eat one bowl before going to bed instead of a pint of ice cream. I don't know exactly.

I do know I didn't expect this: 7 kinds of cereal, 2 flavors of waffle, 3 meal bars, 2 snack bars, 6 cereal bars and 7 flavors of Special K "protein water," which just sounds disgusting but whatever.

Are they kidding me??? If I want to spend the time to buy that many different bars and beverages, and mix and match them throughout the day, I might as well just grocery shop and cook!

They even acknowledge on the "Getting Started" quiz page (not much of a quiz--3 questions) that one reason people have trouble losing weight is because we skip meals, eat the wrong things, are busy... why do they think that is, because we took the time to prepare a healthy dinner and then some mysterious project prevented us from eating it? No!

It's because we don't want to figure out which cut of meat to buy, look up a recipe, hope we have all the spices, and buy some vegetable that will go nicely with it. But that's not much more work than picking 5 cereals, 4 bar flavors, and 6 waters! (And probably cheaper.)

Especially because (and maybe middle America won't have this problem) I seriously doubt any one NYC-area grocery store is going to have all or even half of that stuff!

I'm going to do cereal-only. The closest grocery store has at least 4 flavors of that, so I'll be set there.

I just Googled soy milk with it, because the K site itself is nothing more than an advertisement for the many varieties of Special K products, it has no helpful info like, What if I don't drink cow's milk can I still do the diet... There is a forum on the site, but I found it hard to find anything there. So.

My search results turned up the fact that soy milk is fine. I'm thinking it's better than rice milk because the rice milk is low protein and I'll be starving.

I also found this great review, which is actually a few years old. There may be more research now and the special bars and water may help you lose more weight, but this gives me a good reality check. I quote:

"If you currently have a poor diet, but substitute it with our cereal - you may lose 4.4 pounds over the first two weeks. You will be probably feel very hungry while restricting your calories, and will may find eating cereal for dinner or lunch to be untenable after a while. Boredom could well set in. History shows that a low-fat, higher-carb diet can work, but in the long run it may backfire".

Well, my diet's pretty poor, and a big part of it is simply eating each meal and knowing psychologically I'm done with it, so I don't snack in between. And I avoid eating DB's stuff when I'm mindful of what I put in my mouth.

And, having only eaten cereal all day, it sure made dinner taste good last night... AND got my butt in gear to actually cook the cauliflower in the refrigerator!

So that can't be bad.

Accountability time: Starting weight, 150.
Goal weight for 2 weeks, 145.

Friends with Blogs Updates

My friend Alba has a new blog (for AOL, no less!) called Bright and Spacious, about real estate and home ownership, and generally making the most of the space you're in or moving into or moving out of. Cool. I like the poetry blog but this one's more roomy, ha ha.

Meanwhile I have been neglecting Sara's funny blog of "what were they thinking?" real-estate photos, It's Lovely! I'll Take It! and I see that her banner is a photo of an ad for her blog on city benches, no less! I haven't asked her whether somebody's really good with PhotoShop or if she really did the ads. But how impressive it looks anyway! [Edited to add: Sara says it's a trompe l'oeil. Which these days is a trompe l'software.]

Another friend who is the northern half of mystery writer Evelyn David is recovering from a stomach bug and, I see, also from an addiction to computer solitaire. If I know her, she'll find a way to turn even THAT into a book proposal! (Or a character trait for a character in a future book...) Unlike me who just wastes her time at it. And almost got fired once because of it...

Meanwhile Meredith is busy Twittering instead of finishing a manuscript and also just got back from a silent retreat. (If you Twitter on a silent retreat, is it really silent? N.B.-Meredith did NOT tweet during her retreat.)

I'd love to go on a retreat, silent or not, but can't seem to find anything online suggesting a place I could go!! All advice welcome!

Sneadwoman appears to be impossible to find anywhere other than Wed MD's Autism Support Group. So! Updated her link shall be.

Blessed by Overtipping

Yesterday by accident I put $2 (or it might have even been $3) in the tip jar at Dunkin Donuts. I love this particular DD so much I even thought of tipping, which usually I don't. But the bills stuck together and whoops! There it was, a small wad of bills in place of the single I planned on putting in. Was it even all singles? What if that was a $5 bill inside there?

The counterperson had moved on to taking someone else's order so I had a few seconds.What to do?? I wanted to get it back, simply because it was a mistake! We're not so rich we can tip like THAT! We're on a tight weekend budget, and all of Sunday stretched out before us!

I put my finger back towards the bills but they were folded together tight. I'd have had to remove my gloves, then remove the entire wad and unfold it and peel $1 off to put back in.

I didn't know how I was going to explain what I was doing if the counterperson happened to glance over! No, I'm not helping myself to the money in your tip jar!

So I left whatever it was.

And we ended the weekend with $95. Out of $100. The coffee and three donuts cost more than $5...not even counting the amount of the Unknown Tip! Figure that one out.

This post is my contribution to Bossy's Daily Poverty Party.

Parental Love

Most days after DB gets on the school bus, I come upstairs and feel a pang of worry, love, and hope for him. All I can do at that point is pray for his safety and his mental and emotional comfort for the day.

All I can do is hope I've prepared him the best I can for what he's going to face.

And he's only 6... what will I be like as he grows and the challenges increase?

Is this normal?

It makes me think about God's love for us, how much more God cares for us, thinks about us, hopes we'll make the right choices.

Do you think God worries? Seems outside the scope of emotion for a Divine Being. But the others for sure -- hope, love, concern.

After all, we have free will to make our own choices. No matter how much preparation we've gotten from whatever source worked for us -- church, Sunday School, kind neighbors, the Bible -- in the end we decide what to do.

Compared to God, we all have autism.

Groundhog Day Party

Last year, I hosted a Groundhog Day party for a couple of reasons. First, it was an excuse to have a party during the mid-winter blahs.

Second, it was DB's first year of elementary school and because of his early-September birthday we weren't able to invite the class to a party to get to know everyone.

Like I really needed an excuse! Anyway, as usual with my ideas I did not find one good source for the information I was looking for. I see a little more this year, but not much.

I also got a lot of good feedback about my creative ideas, which makes me think perhaps someone else will benefit from them.

So, I put together a 26-page ebook with ideas for food, activities, and games. It's available HERE.

It includes PDF's of my Groundhog Day poster -- all you need to do is print each page on regular, 8-1/2x11 sheets of paper and tape them side-by-side on the wall!


Here are two of the best URLs I found for this holiday. Honestly, many links at the bottom of the sites I visited last year were broken, so I'm trying to save you following dead trails in a fruitless search for stuff:

Punxsutawney, Pa's main Groundhog Day information site has activities, printables and facts. Go to the Teacher's Corner, then click "Activities for Kids."

If you print "Phil's Puzzle," here is a hint: The outside is not entirely square! In other words, put together the puzzle and draw an outline of the outside edges with a marker before you give it to little kids. You may be better off cutting up your own puzzle using a coloring page.

The "Lessons Plans" area has lots of games and even words to "Groundhog Carols" set to the tune of popular holiday songs.

Punxsutawney Phil's main site has some fun, brief interactive items which are really handy if you're trying to entertain your kids on this subject at the last minute.

This year I see a couple of Groundhog Day crafts to buy at the Oriental Trading website; I didn't see anything like that in 2008. That makes me think it's a growing trend, yah?

Finally, I even put together my very own Groundhog Day book list link.

I should have even more stuff to put in the 2010 edition, since I'm having a Groundhog Day party in DB's class this Friday!

Random Money Thought

Ya know what would be REALLY helpful? If Discover Card rewards had places like the post office and the grocery store as partners.

Now, those are rewards I could easily get into.

Don't get me wrong, I'm tickled pink to have $50 to spend at The Gap. But those other ones... Tres practical!

Finding Time for God

Last week I truly benefited from doing a devotional early in the morning. I was looking forward to a slightly relaxed morning with plenty of time to read, since I was going to drive DB to school today. I got up at 6 am -- close to the usual time -- expecting to spend 5 minutes making a phone call, take a shower, then spend some time with God.

The phone call(s) took half an hour. (Click link if you want to know why.)

Then, I took my shower, and by the time I was dressed, DB was up.
I got him settled on the couch and went to make his lunch.

I spied yesterday's leftover coffee and poured it into a microwavable pitcher and started heating it.

Then I filled the coffee maker.

Then I had to refill the Brita water pitcher.

Then my leftover coffee was hot so I poured a cup and had to refill the sugar bowl.

I noticed my phone on the counter and put it in my pocket.

That made me think about where my watch was...

And I hadn't yet started packing DB's lunch... or snack... or breakfast!

Of course I also hadn't done my devotional yet either, which made me think of all the things we do instead of spending time with God.

Last week went so well for all of us, I absolutely ascribe it to being grounded by that prayer and reading time. I'm not going to let that habit slip away.

And yes, I've done my reading this morning. I sat down as soon as I got home from driving DB to school.

A New Bathrobe

I saw a bathrobe for DuckyBoy at Sears a couple of weeks ago, and have had enough extra cash for it and been wanting to go get it for a week now. It's the right time of year, nice and cold, and his old one is so small it's useless.

Finally yesterday, I took him to Sears and got it. I was glad he was with me -- the 6/7 is perfect for him to grow into while the 4/5 is almost too small ... but just by looking at it I really couldn't tell! I couldn't imagine my little guy was big enough to wear that 6/7!

So this one is almost floor-length, Husband says he looks like a boxer. He'll be able to wear it for a nice long while.

It's a cozy fuzzy robe with a polar bear on the back. I can tell he likes it, as he snuggled into it after his bath.

I like that he can appreciate getting something like that -- there are times we wonder whether he simply sees every situation as an opportunity to acquire, and if he takes everything he has for granted.

So for him to enjoy what could be a little thing like a new robe makes me feel good.

DuckyBoy Update

DB had a great day today!

As I planned, in the car going to school we practiced responding to other children being named Citizen of the Month. I only suggested not to shout out angrily; on his own, DB responded with clapping and saying "Yay, [whatever name I said.] You deserve it, good for you, etc." One name he said, "Booooo," and we discussed the inappropriateness of that, then tried again. Did I ever high-five and praise him for those positive responses!! (Do you know how hard it is to high-five someone in the backseat while you are driving?)

At pickup time this afternoon, his teacher could HARDLY WAIT to tell me how well he did, he did exactly what we practiced. The teachers were so pleased they ALSO wrote me a note, which is out of character for them (at least it has been in the past). And he earned a rubber duck, which means a lot to him.

Sorry to those who have a less traditional faith, but praise God from whom all blessings flow!

Because, although I'm delighted to think I helped with the success, it surely wasn't just what I did. My efforts alone have never done this well before, lol.

And after gymnastics? DB ate TWO Wendy's kid burgers AND two servings of french fries. Being a good citizen really works up an appetite! (He told me he "devoured" his snack and his lunch. How many 6-year-olds use the word "devoured?)

Hopeful Friday

Haiku for Friday,
working on my action guide
The Lord has blessed me:

Just one little strike
First week back from vacation --
SO proud of DB.

A little me time
in quiet house yesterday
restoreth my soul.

DB gets "strikes" at school when he does something especially egregious (shouts, throws something or hits someone). The other kids get them too, sometimes. But this week, which is usually a hard transition back, he only has one so far!

We'll see about today -- it's assembly day, when someone else gets named citizen of the month. He can barely tolerate being ni the assembly at all, and then when they call someone else's name he usually shouts out angrily. I've sent a note to remind the teachers to remind him of expected behavior. We're going to practice not shouting in the car on the way to school.

And also the prayers will begin in 3,2,1...

Janny'tizers recipe

DuckyBoy loves to eat chicken nuggets. His absolute favorites are Tyson Any'tizers, which are bite-sized so every bite has a solid coating around it.

In the past we've had trouble eating out because the diners' version of nuggets are usually much larger than even standard kid nuggets -- "fingers" -- so each bite has much less coating, and also they are often made with real chicken breast, not processed, homogenized meat. (we can't do fast-food nuggets at all since they all have whey in the coating. He'll eat fast-food burgers but not at the diners. Yet.)

However, he has branched out in the past few months to willingly eat the breast fingers at the diners, so I thought it was time to try again at home, particularly since his appetite has increased to the point where he can eat half a $4 box of Any'tizers for dinner, which is not only getting expensive but also just can't be good for him to eat so much processed food all.the.time.

And then I saw this recipe on the Bisquick box:


I modified it to be non-dairy. And I upped the protein portion as well, mostly just to replace the 1/2 cup Parmesan, but also because Husband tries to eat low-carb.

And guess what? For one of the first times ever, we all had the same main dish for dinner! Thank you, Bisquick!!

Church and Autism, Part 2

Anon's comment on my previous Church and Autism post was harsher than necessary (congrats! you're my very first flame!) but did open my eyes a bit. I posted because I was already feeling judged and misunderstood, so your tone did not help with that, but you did raise an issue worth addressing in my heart.

I don't see where in my previous post I say that the rules don't apply to me because my child has autism. In fact, I have always been a frightened rules-follower. But Husband takes a more cavalier approach to life's man-made, small guidelines, which has in fact helped me lead a more enjoyable life in some cases ... and in others, such as this one, puts me in a bit of a bind.

I also think the supervision issue is primarily an insurance/CYA matter; this way the church cannot be held liable for any injuries.

I also probably wrote the situation to sound more black-and-white than it really is. The older kids are only partially supervised in the gym; their parents tend to wander in and then back out (if they come in at all until it's time to leave). DB is on the cusp of needing constant supervision, and since he is a responsible, articulate child, and also not a bully who is ever aggressive toward the other children, we trust him. The two rooms are not so far apart that it's a major problem to get between them. But they are far enough that other than parents, adult flow between them is limited. If we want or need to speak with people who do not have a child in the gym, it can't happen.

The other part of our reason for letting him be there without us is that most other times, I am constantly with DB. And sometimes I would like to be with my husband -- such as when mingling with the people we know at church. The church is too far from our home to participate in many events other than worship, so our primary chance to connect with the community is from 12 to 1 on Sundays, during the coffee hour. (I could go on at length about that whole issue of finding a church closer to home, but won't right now.)

The reason I posted is because I do think something needs to be done. I don't want people to have to bend over backwards to accommodate him. And now there is a pattern of issues -- one thing here and there, I'd be ok. But as I outlined in my post, there now seems to be several areas where his behavior is problematic. This upsets me and I don't have an answer, nor did I find one when I looked around on the web.

In fact, as I've given it more thought, I realize some of these issues are being addressed during the school day as well, so would benefit from follow-up in this structed setting as well.

My one idea: I thought I'd see if any teens/tweens at the church have to do community service for their school, and could log those hours as a "buddy" for DB during the church service and gym time. I can make a list of specific things for them to help him with, including...

• Don't blurt out the answer during the children's sermon
  
• Take a walk during Sunday School if he needs a break so he's not disrupting the other kids
• Help him understand the nuances of playing superhereo with older kids (If you say, "Let's play superheroes," the villains are going to chase you!)

Anon or anyone else, if you have other suggestions for how I might solve this matter, I welcome the ideas. I would appreciate it, though, if they are presented in the spirit of problem-solving rather than judgementalism.

Christmas Comments

I just found my scribbled notes on my bedside table from Christmas morning.

First you need to know we left Santa gummies instead of cookies this year. He seems to like that we mix it up for him.

At 6:40 AM DB ran into the bedroom and said seriously, "This is the report on the gummies and milk: The gummies package is open. It's empty. And the milk doesn't have single drop in it. Santa is real!"

Then he ran back out to look at his presents.

A little later he came in and explained, "Santa couldn't find the right box for the Mega Rig space set, so he put a red bow on it."

(Actually I heard that Santa ordered the frustration-free packaging from Amazon, and since it came with NO packaging, he had no choice but to put it together and attach that bow. It was Santa's only option at the time, but Santa says that next year, he's going back to the packaged version. He regrets the environmental waste but the excitement of the gift lost something for DB without the visuals of what you can do with all the pieces. Live and learn, Santa.)

Autism and Church

I wonder if my other blog should shift from Autism and Public Schools, which many people advocate and talk about and research so much better than me, to Autism and Church.

I stumbled across this idea this evening... of a focus on Autism at a church service on February 8th. I wonder if my church might be open to it.

As part of it, I would be willing to --actually, relieved to -- speak and say that DB has autism and how that manifests itself in the way he acts and thinks at church. (Wonder if Husband would be open to that...)

There is another child at church with autism and other more severe disabilities as well, which might be eye-opening for our congregation to see the spectrum.

This was our experience today:

Toward the beginning of the service, DB said "Amen" after the Lord's Prayer, and I thought how funny it is that someone who overheard him might think he was saying "Amen" to the prayer. In fact, I know he was correcting the pronunciation -- most everyone near us said "ah-men" and he prefers "ay-men".

Then during the children's sermon, as usual he was unable to keep from blurting out the answers when the minister asks them all a question. (Someone has actually commented to Husband about this. Someone with a well-behaved, hand-raising child of course.)

At least he only eyed up the communion elements as he walked past and did not try to take any. Whew!

In his Sunday School class, DuckyBoy does well sometimes and other times not, and the teacher rotates so no one quite knows how to deal with him. They are wonderful moms with good hearts but the best they can do is tolerate him for the 30 minutes. I know he's disruptive, today I get the impression he was intractible. (He's been "off" the past few days anyway, and , I forgot his snack.) He also told me tonight a boy in class told him he was a baby, or playing with a baby toy, he described what he was playing with but I don't know what it was. On the upside, he reconnected with his old friend K., and they drew pictures for each other (the project was to draw for a secret pal in the class and give them the artwork, and apparently they picked each other.)

He flat-out tells the beautifully-voiced soprano who volunteers her time to sing with them that he doesn't like her, her voice, etc. *Sigh.*

DB also got us in an embarrassing situation today after church. Kids are allowed to play in the gym during coffee hour, but, well I'll admit it, they are supposed to be supervised by their parents. He has always been good about coming to get us when he needs us, but today he got a little hurt or something ( I still don't know if it was physical or his feelings that got hurt) and while one mom tried to comfort him, another came to get us.

And, well, she had a few patronizing words for us, too, about how we "might want to keep an eye on him" ... "because he likes to play with the bigger kids and yadda yadda" and "I try to keep an eye on him because my son is there too" and "I think he's hungry" and I think Husband wanted to strangle her. (Edited to add: Later on, Husband was grateful she'd come to get us.)

Anyway, today's experience made me look around a bit on the web. Preliminary search turns up a few drips and drabs -- like a good article from 2002 about a mom and her young child, a Dad's heartfelt post that rang true for me, and a decent-sounding book, Autism and Your Church, though it may be more for my children's ministry coordinator than me.

Since I said an hour ago I was going to go to bed and since tomorrow is The Grind Begins Again Day with the 6 AM alarm, I will cease research for the night. But it's not like I came up with anything that covers the topic extensively. I think there might be a place for me.

Alright Already, Resolutions

I haven't even thought of making resolutions in, oh, ages. But this year the Internet keeps asking and asking.. nag, nag, nag, okay okay, I'll do my homework already!

I find myself with a bit of unexpected free time this afternoon. So this seems a fruitful way to spend it, unlike my usual blogging which sometimes just seems pointless and self-gratifying. (Betcha can't do this in the shower, eh, fellas?)

• I resolve to get some traction in my life this year. Some that feels like my feet are firmly on the ground, not just that my husband dragging me along (which is a good thing he does, don't get me wrong).

I really feel like I don't know who I am anymore, and I can't just blame it on being a mom. I started to put parts of myself away as soon as Husband and I hooked up, and it's not really his fault either (as much as the lazy part of me would like to simply throw up my hands and blame it all on him).

• I resolve to remember what I like to do and do some of those things.

• I resolve to find at least 1 new thing I like to do BY MYSELF and find the space and time to DO IT regularly.

• I resolve to clear the clutter in my home and mind. (It's much harder to get rid of physical clutter now that it's actually worth something on ebay...)

• I resolve not to make any more resolutions since these are Pretty Big already.

Ok, on to my next time-waster... haiku! Got so serious about those resolutions I almost forgot that it was Christina's post that finally made me do them.

I've always felt I
can't fail if I don't try, but
this year I'll be strong.