Haiku Friday: Hot Dogs

A hot dog poem
in honor of our weekend
cooking 100 --

Great Hot Dog Cookoff
our second year doing it,
"The Last DogBender!"

Long lean mystery
meat chopped fine inside a bun
topped with yumminess!

So tell me... what are you doing this weekend?

Lesser Known Milestones

The past couple of weeks I've noticed some subtle milestones in DuckyBoy's life, ones the parenting books never talk about:
* Thirst not satisfied by small bottle of water
* Snack-size ziploc bags don't hold enough of anything for a snack

That got me thinking about the others that, since there's such a wide range of when they occur, the books just don't even bother with. But aren't they huge for moms, like:
* Wipes own butt
* Orders own meal at restaurant
* Can be left alone 5-10 minutes while you run to mailbox or put laundry into dryer (especially in an apartment building, where a locked door and an elevator separates you), or in front of apartment building with heavy objects while you get the car a block away and pull up.
* Turns on TV
* Changes channel on TV
* Finds own DVR'd show

I'm still waiting on these:
*Sets DVR for own shows
* Eats restaurant meal without your having to cut up the nuggets

Haiku Friday: Summer Heat

Hello, 100,
you make DuckyBoy happy;
when he's hot, he's calm.

DuckyBoy is actually happy these days. He's SAYING so.

He's like a different kid these days. He says he's tired and has a summer cold. I think it's partly the swimming -- lots of physical activity -- and also, just maybe, the heat wave has a similar effect as a fever ... making him less anxious, more loving, more calm?

I know, sounds weird. Possible, though.

PS, speaking of weird, I think my snowy header looks a little weird ... but I'm too hot to make a new one right now, and the air conditioner is too loud to put it on. Tell you what, it's on the list!

Doesn't Feel Like Much, Yet...

These are my days this week so far... (this is kind of an amalgamation but you get the idea.)

7 am:
Pack DuckyBoy's snack.
Get Husband's pain meds.
Take shower.
Get dressed.
Get Husband his prednisone by 8 am. (That's what the dosing info says?!).
Have first cup of coffee.
7:40:
Pick up DuckyBoy's friend and drive both boys to school.
Drive home and pick up Husband.
8:30:
Drive him to work.
Have 2nd cup of coffee.
Drive back to Queens.
9:30 am
Shop at Trader Joe's. Get heavy bag of water, flowers, chips.
10:30 am
Scrounge quarters so I can park in front of the nail salon.
Park twice so I'm not too far away from the curb.
10:35:
Let myself get talked into having my eyebrows and lip waxed in addition to bikini.
11:30:
Drive to DB's school and pick him up.
12:00:
Listen to DB vent at me.
(Monday) Take him to dentist on Long Island.
12:45:
Sit in chair with DB while dental assistant cleans his teeth.
Pet nice kitty on the way back to the car.
1:30:
(Monday) Take proud son home. Agree he should be proud to have endured cleaning he was scared of.
3:30:
Agree to take him to Disney store for a white Puffle because he was so good at the dentist. Resist comparing white puffle with tooth for fear it will be a turn-off (likely). Remind him that the Lego store (latest obsession) opened in the mall.
5 pm:
Begin feeding DB dinner.
6:45 pm:
Go to pool because it's too hot to go home.
8:10 pm:
Get home and give DB enough to eat that he stops saying "I'm starving!" and will go to bed.
8:25:
Help DB brush his teeth. Read to him. Set up "guards." Get him cold water. Check hamster. Give her fresh water. Turn off room light. Turn on nightlight and music.
8:40:
Change his fuzzy blanket for my old quilt... slightly less heat-holding, yet still protective from things that go bump in night.
8:50:
Collapse on bed next to Husband and watch TV.

* * *
We've also been to the Hall of Science with a friend, and we've been to the pool I think 3 days out of 3. And today we went grocery shopping. And, sucker that I am, I agreed to go back to the mall. I swear, this is the last Lego for a while! (I'm taking a cue from my friend and have offered DB a deal -- his next coveted set for some math work with coins ... now if I can just find that workbook I bought!

Where's the Gout Diet?

Husband has been having a bad bout with gout (I know, it's awful that that rhymes ...) this past week.

Sketchy help on the internet, and in the library as well. Maybe an opening for me!

It's Too Hot!

DuckyBoy has been like a different kid, most of the time, since my last post. Maybe, just maybe, something got through. AS Husband said, "Sometimes, you get a glimpse that he's going to turn out ok."

DB's also been HUNGRY nonstop for the past week or so! It's actually fun to be able to make food for him that he chomps through and then wants more.

And not just junk, though he is mostly sticking to his usuals -- oyster crackers with cream cheese, chicken nuggets, fries -- he's also taken a fancy to Boar's Head Baby Swiss cheese, pretzel thins, and hummus. That's my boy!!

Haiku Friday: Harrumph

Apparently DuckyBoy is doing great at summer camp. He's (fairly) upbeat about getting on the bus, where his friend is riding for the summer who usually goes by car during the school year. Not that I dare call him a "friend" because then DB will be sure to rebuke me: "He's not my BEST friend!"

Anyway. No one bothered to tell us moms that the kids are arriving half an hour late ... meaning DB and his friend are on the bus for just about an hour and a half each morning!! And they miss the "social activities worksheets" the kids do over breakfast. Of all the things to miss!!

But his teacher says he's been great so far. Which is good, because as soon as he sees me he turns into Drama King, unless he's in the pool or I am doing exactly what he wants me to do.

Which I am Not.Doing.Any.More.

Can you tell I am a bit p.o.'d at DB tonight?? We went to the (half an hour from nowhere near anywhere we ever go otherwise) dentist today and he screamed, fought, cried, and screamed some more when they tried to clean, just clean, his teeth. I'm spitting mad at him and he knows it. There was no mask, no laughing gas, and he's had a cleaning at least twice. But no. Apparently his new schtick for the dentist office is to freak out. He'd better not repeat that shtick on Monday when we go back for the cleaning! The dentist did get him to let her count his teeth, and she promised that's all she'd do and kept her word.

Did I mention they're a half an hour from nowhere??

Don't worry, he's been reassured that he is loved, and always will be, but he had no TV and fell asleep on the couch during our Bible study tonight. "I'm having trouble enjoying this relaxation time without tv," he moaned at one point. I told him his choices were to try, or go to sleep.

Can we tell a story? Um, no. I was honest with him -- I'm too mad at you, I said. Can I help you find a Lego part? Um, no. (I did help him download a pattern.)

I don't care that it's been like, 1,000 degrees here in NYC the last few days. I don't care that he's probably worried about 3rd grade and certainly reacting to the end of 2nd grade.

He's got to reason to be the way he's been toward me. The things he says range from mean to demanding to rude. I'm totally sick of it.

So mad at my son
and yet I love him so much --
my heart breaks in two.

Sigh. That's the best I can do today. I look forward to reading everyone else's haiku to pull me out of this funk! (And guess what? NO school-camp on Fridays, so we're stuck with each other all day! As of tonight my plan is: I'm going to get a bikini wax, a pedicure, and grocery shop. I also may need to criss cross Queens looking for 16-oz iced-coffee cups with lids. (Who knew they'd be so elusive?) Any other ideas, besides driving past every playground with a cackle?? Humph.

Please, do better than me! Link to your haiku post below, and leave a comment, too, unless you'd rather kick and scream for me...

Queensboro Bridge Poem

Queens-bound traffic jam
more like a traffic noodle,
one long thin line
on the shelf of the outbound bridge.

The only thing moving is the litter
tumbling blithely in the hot breeze.

Move forward in jerky spurts
then stare at the pairs of red eyes
that glare back from the cars ahead,
resigned to our common fate in the chute.

Whazza?

I have been so negligent ... even my ad network has left me (temporarily)! Apologies all around.
I'm having trouble logging into Google (aka Blogger) consistently -- this time it worked, hooray.

I missed 2 weeks of Haiku Friday?? My schedule must be off.
Why, yes it is... school's out for the summer!

"Summer camp" started today. In quotes because DuckyBoy is figuring it out: "It's just school!" (Well, yes, but only 4 hours' worth. And not as intense.) But, he had a good time anyway today, even on the bus because his friend whose mom drives him during the year is on it for the summer. (Not that they're Best Friends ... he's certain to point that out to us every time we mention this kid's name. Sheesh.)

Remembered this weekend that he sleepwalks/ sleep talks when he's very anxious ... which is right before something new. There, it's in print now. One year I'll notice the pattern.

Looks like I make more typos than usual after I've had 2 g&t's. Imagine that.

Had a heart-wrenching heart-to-heart with DB tonight about being happy. "Every other kid is happy except me."

Happiness is fleeting, I tell him, and also that all those other kids don't rethink every minute of their day Every.Single.Time. "Can I brush my teeth in bed? "You don't comb my hair on weekends!"

I even had to tell him that people comb their hair on weekends. I know that's hard to hear, I said. Dad and I have tried to protect you from the pain you feel, but it's not working. So you might as well know.

I'm sure I contributed to his being this way. And I'm just as sure it's partly genetic, as both adults in the household are on Zoloft. But what else can I do???
Tough love, redefined. In a marshmallow sort of way.

Overall the end of the year went really well for him. I got "guypped" out of a party-ish thing at the pool club on the last day of school: ALL the other moms (and their kids) were going, we were all going to order pizza, play in the pool, yadda yadda, I was telling peopole I was going up until like a half-hour before pickup time ...

... at which time DB informed me in no uncertain terms all he wanted to do was Go. Home.

I forget how anxious the end of year makes him.

So we went home.

I hope I did the right thing.