Ooo, now this is eerie. A God-incidence, perhaps? Something I stumbled across while perusing blogs is a perfect fit with my family's thoughts today.
DuckyBoy's dad was just telling me this morning that he heard a study saying a high percentage of kindergarteners have a clear area of skill they're really good at, like words or math, and as kids get older the percentage who still have something they're really good at drops by a lot. He was musing on what if there were a school that really focused on DuckyBoy's strengths, like with words, and just taught him the basics of math -- you know, enough to get by but not making him crazy with trig or other things he'll never use if it's not his thing.
And then I sat down at the computer and remembered it's the last day to participate in a so-called "blast" about children's strengths by a group called the Parent Bloggers Network. (As near as I can define it, a "blast" means you all post on the same subject.) Turns out this one is in collaboration with an author named Jenifer Fox, who from her bio I'd also call an education expert. She is leader of something called the The Strengths Movement in Schools. Which deals with this very issue.
(Frankly, they had me at "Hello. Write about your child's strengths." So this is just overwhelming!) So, here I go.
A big thing I think will really serve him well in his life is his strength at making connections: "This (new) thing is like that other thing I already know..." or "This has X in common with that."
Back in August I tried to explain this strength of his to our old (as in no longer at the school) social worker when she was at our house for the kindergarten intake interview. So after I said, "He's good at making connections between things" she said, "Oh, he likes to build things?" *Sigh.* How as I going to dumb it down enough for her? Not sure I did -- you either get it or you don't.
Anyway, so that wasn't one of her strengths...
Another of Duckyboy's is his memory. It's a bit of a cliche for someone with Aspergers to have this. (Aside: He doesn't officially have Aspergers but his NDP calls him "Aspergers-ish"; the way I see it, he didn't talk early so she can't check every box that officially fits the condition, but he tends that way on the spectrum.) He can hear a book once and, the next time through, correct you if you get a word wrong. This is selective, however -- does he remember his socks go in the hamper? No. Does he remember the homework assignment from the top of the page to the bottom? Not always. So I don't think he's a photographic-memory capital-G Genius, like Rainman, but he's got a good memory.
It's cool when something happens like, he knows the President has a family because we saw a photo of them 10 minutes before -- a photo (and conversation) I'd already forgotten. It's less cool (for both of us) when he's trying to make me repeat or remember something we did together -- "You know, the make-a-snowman? We called it doggie glue? It was homework..." *Sigh.* Oh well, I figure those situations give him a chance to strengthen his patience; he's given me a very good description, I just still can't remember. I reassured him his father struggles with me on that too.
I think his memory also helps him learn new skills; his dislike of being told what to do counteracts it, but his ability to remember what he's been told about the right way to behave (at school, especially) certainly works in his favor. The social-stories books that his ST writes help with that since they offer a visual reinforcement.
Which is another strength, compared to me at least: He notices visual details. He made a drawing of Donald Duck last week that, while doesn't exactly look like Donald Duck, captures the details, right down to the 2 buttons on his shirt and the 3 parts of his hat: the brim, the top poufy part, and the little pointy ribbon.
Next, I'd say verbal skills. The guy uses words and phrases you'd never expect from a 5-year-old. And he uses them correctly, a fact his teachers corroborate. It's more common on the spectrum to find a kid using big words but incorrectly; he does that sometimes, but I think the reason is more that, well, he's five for pete's sake. Even geniuses (not that I'm saying he is one, I'm just making a point) must have some learning curve!
His use of words goes over many people's heads; they simply cannot fathom that a small child is speaking to them the way he does.
Now, this does let some of his spectrum-ness show; he'll launch into a full explanation of whatever he's currently doing to whomever happens to cross this path. For example, he told the 2nd-most-harried mom in our building this morning, "I am the President of the United States." She, being in the midst of wheeling her child to his school bus, can't be blamed for giving him a rather blank look. He told her daughter yesterday, and it was Urgent! Urgent! that he Tell.Her.Right.Now! as she was leaving the building to get on her own school bus. DuckyBoy poked his head out the door, actually called her name, and said, "They're having a Powerful Person Day at my school tomorrow and I'm going to be the President." Poor kid (she's a teen); she looked momentarily flummoxed and then... just... got on her bus. I'm not sure I would have known what else to do either!
I never know what he's going to do when this stuff happens; I don't want to "shush" him, so I just tell him afterwards that it wasn't a good time since the bus was waiting. Any hints on future handlings welcome...
But I digress. Another strength: Duckyboy's imagination and creativity in telling stories. He can spin a great tale, though he goes so fast I can barely follow them sometimes, let alone remember the whole complicated thing long enough to write it down.
It's no wonder he abhors it when my stories (which can be pretty good, if I do say so myself) take a turn for the pedantic --"And then the duck didn't listen to his mommy so he didn't get to eat dessert. The End."
He's also creative about describing things he's going to invent in the future. That's fun to listen to -- machines that fly, drive for you, ignore red lights. This is a popular pastime while we're driving on QB!
Finally, I'd say that he is a surprisingly good traveler. Especially for a kid on the autistic spectrum, who craves routine and sameness (usually), he is interested in new places and experiences (usually).
Well, this lacks the detailed examples that I wish it had, but maybe I'll think of those later and add them in. I wonder what tells me about my strengths.
Friday, February 29, 2008
The President Is in the Building
We remembered this morning to remind DuckyBoy that he still has to be himself today, that he will be expected to do all the usual kindergartener things.
"But the President bosses the other people around," he replied. After his dad finished laughing he said "Yes but, you are a kid wearing a costume of the president. You are not really the president." It amazes me how specific and literal we have to be to get the point across!
I reminded him that when I was Ms Frizzle for Halloween I still had to drive our regular car, make his breakfast and dinner, etc. I think it made sense.
Because there was apparently a bit of trouble on Halloween with him thinking he REALLY WAS a Transformer and that the rules of the class did not apply. But pffft! that was waaaay back in October; he's much more mature now.
And Presidential: As I left (I drove him this morning), I could hear him saying to the other kids who'd arrived, "I know, I know, everyone wants to see my briefcase. Line up, single file, single file." I think I've created a monster, lol!
Also in attendance this morning, just from the kindergartners we saw, were JFK, Betsy Ross, and George Washington. A very political crowd!
DuckyBoy was very excited to see George Washington, telling the boy (a friend of his), "We're the opposite Georges!", opposite in that one was the first president and one is president now. Oh, and he even used the other boy's name -- as in, "We're the opposite Georges, Name!", which I consider a big socialization win!
He was also hopped up and down in delight to see the friend who was dressed as JFK had dressed up -- and not only dressed up but was dressed as another president.
Now, whether or not he eats his Presidential Pop-Tart is up to the teachers. He didn't want it in the "limo."
Did you know the White House website has a kids area? I would never have thought of it. It's aimed at kids a bit older -- I tried the elementary school math challenge and didn't understand it AT ALL!! -- but the Concentration games are cute and revealed some interesting pictures of rooms in the White House.
Last night DuckyBoy loved (as in, obsessed over and wanted to play again and again) the Barney & Beazley Maze, wherein you must use the arrow keys to get one of the President's Scottie dogs through the maze to the other dog. We also scrolled through the Wikipedia info about Dubya, I read him the first 3 sentences and also the fact that he has the distinction of having received the highest and lowest approval ratings of any president! Interesting. Then we scrolled down the rest of the page quickly and looked at the pictures.
The children were supposed to bring in some information about their person. Now, I'm thinking, How are we gonna do that in kindergarten? I'm not printing a bunch of pages he can't read... So my idea was to write a few questions on paper and have him write the answers:
* Who is the President?
* Where does he live?
* What state is he from? (I was delighted he wanted to spell "Texis" himself -- that's been a big struggle at school. He wants to spell everything right and they want him to sound it out at this age.)
* Does he have a family? (We hadn't talked about this, but he knew -- from our 2-second glance at/discussion of one of the Wiki photos!)
* Does he have any pets?
And finally,
* What does he do? (Signs laws.)
And you know what? No problem at all to get him to write those words. He did want to write "NYC" instead of "White House" (after all, it's shorter, and he got to write that at our hotel check-in last week instead of spelling out New York City) but it was a momentary protest. And he also voluntarily cut out one of the Presidential seals we printed to decorate his briefcase. And he helped paint the briefcase.
Amazing what a little involvement in the subject matter can do for his desire to practice these skills. I know his program individualizes much more than regular school would, but it's still a struggle for him to do assignments about things he doesn't care about (sort the shapes, etc. -- Why, he thinks?) I'm glad we took advantage of this chance to help him see, for lack of a less-trite phrase, some real-world application of writing, cutting and so on.
Oh and lest I forget our pun for the day -- his purple bath-toy seal went with him as his other "Presidential seal." Don't blame him -- he gets that from me (much to his father's chagrin).
"But the President bosses the other people around," he replied. After his dad finished laughing he said "Yes but, you are a kid wearing a costume of the president. You are not really the president." It amazes me how specific and literal we have to be to get the point across!
I reminded him that when I was Ms Frizzle for Halloween I still had to drive our regular car, make his breakfast and dinner, etc. I think it made sense.
Because there was apparently a bit of trouble on Halloween with him thinking he REALLY WAS a Transformer and that the rules of the class did not apply. But pffft! that was waaaay back in October; he's much more mature now.
And Presidential: As I left (I drove him this morning), I could hear him saying to the other kids who'd arrived, "I know, I know, everyone wants to see my briefcase. Line up, single file, single file." I think I've created a monster, lol!
Also in attendance this morning, just from the kindergartners we saw, were JFK, Betsy Ross, and George Washington. A very political crowd!
DuckyBoy was very excited to see George Washington, telling the boy (a friend of his), "We're the opposite Georges!", opposite in that one was the first president and one is president now. Oh, and he even used the other boy's name -- as in, "We're the opposite Georges, Name!", which I consider a big socialization win!
He was also hopped up and down in delight to see the friend who was dressed as JFK had dressed up -- and not only dressed up but was dressed as another president.
Now, whether or not he eats his Presidential Pop-Tart is up to the teachers. He didn't want it in the "limo."
Did you know the White House website has a kids area? I would never have thought of it. It's aimed at kids a bit older -- I tried the elementary school math challenge and didn't understand it AT ALL!! -- but the Concentration games are cute and revealed some interesting pictures of rooms in the White House.
Last night DuckyBoy loved (as in, obsessed over and wanted to play again and again) the Barney & Beazley Maze, wherein you must use the arrow keys to get one of the President's Scottie dogs through the maze to the other dog. We also scrolled through the Wikipedia info about Dubya, I read him the first 3 sentences and also the fact that he has the distinction of having received the highest and lowest approval ratings of any president! Interesting. Then we scrolled down the rest of the page quickly and looked at the pictures.
The children were supposed to bring in some information about their person. Now, I'm thinking, How are we gonna do that in kindergarten? I'm not printing a bunch of pages he can't read... So my idea was to write a few questions on paper and have him write the answers:
* Who is the President?
* Where does he live?
* What state is he from? (I was delighted he wanted to spell "Texis" himself -- that's been a big struggle at school. He wants to spell everything right and they want him to sound it out at this age.)
* Does he have a family? (We hadn't talked about this, but he knew -- from our 2-second glance at/discussion of one of the Wiki photos!)
* Does he have any pets?
And finally,
* What does he do? (Signs laws.)
And you know what? No problem at all to get him to write those words. He did want to write "NYC" instead of "White House" (after all, it's shorter, and he got to write that at our hotel check-in last week instead of spelling out New York City) but it was a momentary protest. And he also voluntarily cut out one of the Presidential seals we printed to decorate his briefcase. And he helped paint the briefcase.
Amazing what a little involvement in the subject matter can do for his desire to practice these skills. I know his program individualizes much more than regular school would, but it's still a struggle for him to do assignments about things he doesn't care about (sort the shapes, etc. -- Why, he thinks?) I'm glad we took advantage of this chance to help him see, for lack of a less-trite phrase, some real-world application of writing, cutting and so on.
Oh and lest I forget our pun for the day -- his purple bath-toy seal went with him as his other "Presidential seal." Don't blame him -- he gets that from me (much to his father's chagrin).
Thursday, February 28, 2008
Note from the Toys
Dear DuckyBoy,
We didn't know that your being in kindergarten would mean we don't get played with so much. One day, it was a given that at least some of us would be out and about, getting some play, as it were. Now? Your homework isn't that hard, we know. And since you get it a week at a time, Mommy manages your time pretty well around the swim lesson and other stuff so you don't get stuck with a lot each night. But still. It requires time to be managed.
Between that and the hour on the bus, well, that just seems like time wasted. Why doesn't Mommy come get you so you could play with us during that time? Doesn't she love us any more?
Signed,
The Little People
and
The Thomas Trains
** Warning: Haiku Ahead **
The toys sit and sigh
waiting for their time to come
when their boy can play.
We didn't know that your being in kindergarten would mean we don't get played with so much. One day, it was a given that at least some of us would be out and about, getting some play, as it were. Now? Your homework isn't that hard, we know. And since you get it a week at a time, Mommy manages your time pretty well around the swim lesson and other stuff so you don't get stuck with a lot each night. But still. It requires time to be managed.
Between that and the hour on the bus, well, that just seems like time wasted. Why doesn't Mommy come get you so you could play with us during that time? Doesn't she love us any more?
Signed,
The Little People
and
The Thomas Trains
** Warning: Haiku Ahead **
The toys sit and sigh
waiting for their time to come
when their boy can play.
The President
Tomorrow is a Spirit Day at school, "Powerful People Day." It can be someone past or present.
The first person DuckyBoy thought of after I explained the concept was Christopher Columbus.
Then he wanted to know about presidents -- what did George Washington do, then I chimed in with what Abe Lincoln did, then he wanted to know who is president now. That's who he wants to be!
Now, we don't talk a lot of politics around my home. We're not big Dubya fans, to put it tactfully. But I found myself really wanting to describe him in positive terms to this impressionable young man -- it seems more about the institution of The Presidency than about one man in particular. So I think I did OK.
So that's who he wants to be tomorrow. So this afternoon we've got a little bit of web research (learning a bit about the person you pick is a requirement), craft projects (a briefcase), and shoe shopping (something dressy enough to go with his suit) to do!
And for the record they have at least one thing in common -- middle initial.
The first person DuckyBoy thought of after I explained the concept was Christopher Columbus.
Then he wanted to know about presidents -- what did George Washington do, then I chimed in with what Abe Lincoln did, then he wanted to know who is president now. That's who he wants to be!
Now, we don't talk a lot of politics around my home. We're not big Dubya fans, to put it tactfully. But I found myself really wanting to describe him in positive terms to this impressionable young man -- it seems more about the institution of The Presidency than about one man in particular. So I think I did OK.
So that's who he wants to be tomorrow. So this afternoon we've got a little bit of web research (learning a bit about the person you pick is a requirement), craft projects (a briefcase), and shoe shopping (something dressy enough to go with his suit) to do!
And for the record they have at least one thing in common -- middle initial.
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Bored
How does a kid who hates change get bored so easily? Well, maybe not easily in this case since it has taken from September till now for Duckyboy to be just plain "Bored" with school. There's still plenty for him to learn, mind you, he's just, I think bored with the same-old same-old routine.
I'm going to chalk it up to back-from-vacation-blahs and hope for the best.
I'm going to chalk it up to back-from-vacation-blahs and hope for the best.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
From Sun to Snow
Ahh, nothing like coming home from vacation and getting walloped with a head cold! Or something, I don't know what this is. I haven't woken up with my eyes glued shut since I was, like, 5. But the doc tells me I'm not contagious. I just don't FEEL like doing anything involving anyone else! TV, soup, juice, sleep.
DuckyBoy of course is just fine... though I suspect something is up with his system too.
Clue Number 1: He had a Good Day Monday, says his teacher. First day back from vacation and it was able to be called good?? He doesn't like Mondays as a matter of course, so for the transition day after a week off to be decent, wow. He must be feverish. I mean, "maturing."
Clue Number 2: He wished me a happy birthday and didn't freak out about anything this morning, even though I was NOT going to be able to go on the field trip (teacher error about how many parents were allowed to go -- don't get me started). And he informed his bus driver and matron it was my birthday, which was sweet. Must be feverish. I mean, "learning social skills."
Anyway I am looking forward to posting all kinds of tidbits about our most recent Orlando vacation. Once I can be out of bed for longer than 15 minutes without feeling exhausted, that is.
Two quick things:
* DuckyBoy rode the Shamu Express (roller coaster) so many times in a row we lost count. I think it was something like 50. His cousin who rode with him deserves a medal!!
* The big tactile/sensory gain, I think, from this trip is Sleeping Under The Covers! Wahoo! Thank you, Florida humidity and air conditioning!!
DuckyBoy of course is just fine... though I suspect something is up with his system too.
Clue Number 1: He had a Good Day Monday, says his teacher. First day back from vacation and it was able to be called good?? He doesn't like Mondays as a matter of course, so for the transition day after a week off to be decent, wow. He must be feverish. I mean, "maturing."
Clue Number 2: He wished me a happy birthday and didn't freak out about anything this morning, even though I was NOT going to be able to go on the field trip (teacher error about how many parents were allowed to go -- don't get me started). And he informed his bus driver and matron it was my birthday, which was sweet. Must be feverish. I mean, "learning social skills."
Anyway I am looking forward to posting all kinds of tidbits about our most recent Orlando vacation. Once I can be out of bed for longer than 15 minutes without feeling exhausted, that is.
Two quick things:
* DuckyBoy rode the Shamu Express (roller coaster) so many times in a row we lost count. I think it was something like 50. His cousin who rode with him deserves a medal!!
* The big tactile/sensory gain, I think, from this trip is Sleeping Under The Covers! Wahoo! Thank you, Florida humidity and air conditioning!!
Friday, February 15, 2008
Idiot Drivers
Who ARE these idiots who honk at a stopped school bus? I cannot believe how often it happens. And they can SEE the bus, it's not like they're a block away and randomly honking in hopes that whatever is stopping traffic will suddenly move because they honk. Our society is really screwed up if the 30 seconds they must remain stopped for the handicapped-kids bus ruins their schedule, their day, their life.
No, they can see the red flashing lights, and sometimes they honk WHILE the lights are flashing; more often, they lean on the horn the instant the red lights go off and before the driver has put the bus back into gear.
Good thing I'm a charitable Christian woman, otherwise I could talk some trash. (Once in a while, I do, if I know which car honked... one morning, I let my finger do the talking ... not a moment I'm proud of.)
I feel like making a big sign: MY SPECIAL-NEEDS CHILD WHO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF "HURRY UP" IS GETTING ON THE BUS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Oh and also it should say IF YOU HONKED, DROP DEAD.
Is it possible Queens has so many drivers from other countries (Eastern Europe, Long Island) who are unaware of what a stopped school bus means?
Dairy intake update: Fairly bad morning getting ready for school. DuckyBoy refused to eat breakfast, even after I reminded him he can't eat at school on Fridays. Refused to wear assembly clothes. (Good thing he's not Citizen of the Month this month -- at least, I don't think he is. They usually tell the 'rents so they can be there.)
Poor kid, he really, really wants Citizen of the Month. He's trying really hard -- and it may be that they really just don't think he's earned it yet. Or they may be making him wait just to see how long he can wait. I wish they wouldn't share that type of stuff with me -- it makes me sad for him when I know he's being manipulated. I know it's for his own good, but isn't school hard enough without them making extra efforts to push his buttons? I suppose that's what this program is supposed to do, help stretch him. But I find it hard to be enthusiastic about it.
Time has so little meaning for him that another month away is an eternity; the principal and one of his teachers have commented about what a good citizen he's being, but for him, another assembly when he doesn't get the award is going to be torture. Can't we try to reward the kid who wants it, as opposed to the kids who don't care that much about it one way or another?
No, they can see the red flashing lights, and sometimes they honk WHILE the lights are flashing; more often, they lean on the horn the instant the red lights go off and before the driver has put the bus back into gear.
Good thing I'm a charitable Christian woman, otherwise I could talk some trash. (Once in a while, I do, if I know which car honked... one morning, I let my finger do the talking ... not a moment I'm proud of.)
I feel like making a big sign: MY SPECIAL-NEEDS CHILD WHO DOES NOT UNDERSTAND THE MEANING OF "HURRY UP" IS GETTING ON THE BUS, THANK YOU VERY MUCH. Oh and also it should say IF YOU HONKED, DROP DEAD.
Is it possible Queens has so many drivers from other countries (Eastern Europe, Long Island) who are unaware of what a stopped school bus means?
Dairy intake update: Fairly bad morning getting ready for school. DuckyBoy refused to eat breakfast, even after I reminded him he can't eat at school on Fridays. Refused to wear assembly clothes. (Good thing he's not Citizen of the Month this month -- at least, I don't think he is. They usually tell the 'rents so they can be there.)
Poor kid, he really, really wants Citizen of the Month. He's trying really hard -- and it may be that they really just don't think he's earned it yet. Or they may be making him wait just to see how long he can wait. I wish they wouldn't share that type of stuff with me -- it makes me sad for him when I know he's being manipulated. I know it's for his own good, but isn't school hard enough without them making extra efforts to push his buttons? I suppose that's what this program is supposed to do, help stretch him. But I find it hard to be enthusiastic about it.
Time has so little meaning for him that another month away is an eternity; the principal and one of his teachers have commented about what a good citizen he's being, but for him, another assembly when he doesn't get the award is going to be torture. Can't we try to reward the kid who wants it, as opposed to the kids who don't care that much about it one way or another?
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Learning Love
I'm so proud. On our way to the car this morning, DuckyBoy happily carried his bag full of Valentines for his classmates, and said, "I like giving away Valentines. (long pause, he was clearly thinking about this) It makes me feel...happy."
Eureka! Jackpot! A happy feeling! How do I jump all over this one without scaring the kid???
Me (very calmly,or at least moderately calmly): "That's wonderful, DB. That's what love is! That means you are feeling loving." (I resist from shaking him and saying, "Remember this! Remember this! Burn this into your brain! Loving is what it's all about!!!")
Instead I took a deep breath, and we went back to talking about Donald Duck.
I'm also proud of my budding actor/director ... he did a great job as Goldilocks, and I could also hear him offscreen when the other group of his classmates were performing, saying, "Put the bowls down!" and at another point, "That's not right!" (His group did the play slightly differently-- heaven forbid!!) He also offered to chase after the other Goldilocks when he left the bears' house at the end. Couldn't wait for some screen time, I guess!
Dairy intake update: He was jumping all over his teacher while they sat on the floor as we all watched the video, and he was having some issue with sitting behind S. -- maybe he couldn't see around her, but he kept grabbing a piece of her hair and squeezing it. Not pulling it, just squeezing it really hard. She didn't say anything and the teachers didn't notice so I stayed out of it. But otherwise, that's the only poorer-behavior-than-usual that I've seen so far today ... and the whole situation, watching a video in the library with parents there, was a very out-of-the-ordinary circumstance -- which always makes him a bit out of sorts anyway.
Eureka! Jackpot! A happy feeling! How do I jump all over this one without scaring the kid???
Me (very calmly,or at least moderately calmly): "That's wonderful, DB. That's what love is! That means you are feeling loving." (I resist from shaking him and saying, "Remember this! Remember this! Burn this into your brain! Loving is what it's all about!!!")
Instead I took a deep breath, and we went back to talking about Donald Duck.
I'm also proud of my budding actor/director ... he did a great job as Goldilocks, and I could also hear him offscreen when the other group of his classmates were performing, saying, "Put the bowls down!" and at another point, "That's not right!" (His group did the play slightly differently-- heaven forbid!!) He also offered to chase after the other Goldilocks when he left the bears' house at the end. Couldn't wait for some screen time, I guess!
Dairy intake update: He was jumping all over his teacher while they sat on the floor as we all watched the video, and he was having some issue with sitting behind S. -- maybe he couldn't see around her, but he kept grabbing a piece of her hair and squeezing it. Not pulling it, just squeezing it really hard. She didn't say anything and the teachers didn't notice so I stayed out of it. But otherwise, that's the only poorer-behavior-than-usual that I've seen so far today ... and the whole situation, watching a video in the library with parents there, was a very out-of-the-ordinary circumstance -- which always makes him a bit out of sorts anyway.
6 am
"Mommy, can we tell a story about Donald Duck, and can he be sick?"
Sure, I think, Once upon a time Donald Duck was sick. Then he woke his mom up at 6 am and he was fine so he finished his Valentines and he went to school. The End.
But that's not what I said. But today seems fine -- maybe the hoodie sweatshirt overheated him after swimming?
Sure, I think, Once upon a time Donald Duck was sick. Then he woke his mom up at 6 am and he was fine so he finished his Valentines and he went to school. The End.
But that's not what I said. But today seems fine -- maybe the hoodie sweatshirt overheated him after swimming?
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Fingers Still Crossed
So far, so good... at least in terms of dairy-laced baked goods. Yesterday's cupcake seemed to have caused no ill effect, unless taking 10 minutes of a half-hour swim lesson to get used to the water ("I'm stiiiill getting uuuuuuused to it..." he whined to his instructor. I swear I almost hear him say "Suckah" under his breath...)
I do agree with him that this pool is numerous degrees cooler than the bathwater known as the St. Bart's pool, but the teacher, newbie that she is, obviously does not know two important things:
1. He will play her for all she is worth. For minutes 11-25 of the lesson I had a fantasy going in my head about how I was going to have to Speak.To.Both.Of.Them after the lesson about how just because they played when every other child in the pool was getting, oh, I don't know, a SWIM LESSON, does not mean the same will happen next week. Because ...
2. This is how he thinks: If we did it like that once, we can do it like that again. Is this, as I suspect, an Aspergers thing? If so, why is this not written at the top of every scrap of instructional material that someone who might work with a HFA child might read???
It's all well and good to list vague phrases such as "Resistant to change," but let's spell it out for all these nice people: If You Let It Happen Once, Kiss the Way You Want to Do It Next Time Good-Bye.
Then came minutes 26-30, and I took it all back. Duckyboy actually swam around when he thought he was playing! Ha! Who's the suckah now? Adults rule!
I still think he's going to want to have his lesson be like that every week though. And it could work -- but he's gonna have to show a lot of improvement every week in order for me to be able to watch that again.
He ate the remaining contraband, I mean bake-sale cookies, on the way home. Probably full of butter, I can tell by the way he snarfed them down. Wait, maybe that was just because someone Other Than Me made them? No, wait, one of our sesame cookies was in there too. Oh, maybe the kid was actually hungry at 5:45 pm!
Anyway, fingers still crossed. And not just about the dairy -- how's about a 101.7 degree fever for bedtime??
With any luck, it will burn off any milk-based effects. And I'm not even kidding; a fever makes him loving, workable, and snuggly. In other words, less autistic. And there's even proof of it now. It's just one study, but it's a start.
Husband just told me to blog about why SuperNanny Jo Frost is the hottest babe on TV. And that, friends, is one of the reasons I love him.
I do agree with him that this pool is numerous degrees cooler than the bathwater known as the St. Bart's pool, but the teacher, newbie that she is, obviously does not know two important things:
1. He will play her for all she is worth. For minutes 11-25 of the lesson I had a fantasy going in my head about how I was going to have to Speak.To.Both.Of.Them after the lesson about how just because they played when every other child in the pool was getting, oh, I don't know, a SWIM LESSON, does not mean the same will happen next week. Because ...
2. This is how he thinks: If we did it like that once, we can do it like that again. Is this, as I suspect, an Aspergers thing? If so, why is this not written at the top of every scrap of instructional material that someone who might work with a HFA child might read???
It's all well and good to list vague phrases such as "Resistant to change," but let's spell it out for all these nice people: If You Let It Happen Once, Kiss the Way You Want to Do It Next Time Good-Bye.
Then came minutes 26-30, and I took it all back. Duckyboy actually swam around when he thought he was playing! Ha! Who's the suckah now? Adults rule!
I still think he's going to want to have his lesson be like that every week though. And it could work -- but he's gonna have to show a lot of improvement every week in order for me to be able to watch that again.
He ate the remaining contraband, I mean bake-sale cookies, on the way home. Probably full of butter, I can tell by the way he snarfed them down. Wait, maybe that was just because someone Other Than Me made them? No, wait, one of our sesame cookies was in there too. Oh, maybe the kid was actually hungry at 5:45 pm!
Anyway, fingers still crossed. And not just about the dairy -- how's about a 101.7 degree fever for bedtime??
With any luck, it will burn off any milk-based effects. And I'm not even kidding; a fever makes him loving, workable, and snuggly. In other words, less autistic. And there's even proof of it now. It's just one study, but it's a start.
Husband just told me to blog about why SuperNanny Jo Frost is the hottest babe on TV. And that, friends, is one of the reasons I love him.
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
Bake Sale - Fingers Crossed
The big pre-Valentine's Day bake sale at DuckyBoy's school was today. So, I drove him to school and prepped him that I would be helping for a little bit "to set up." (Actually, I volunteered to help for the first 2 hours, but he gets a little jealous thinking about me with other kids, so I leave that part off.)
Turns out his class was scheduled to come this morning, so I was able to stay until they came. (That of course entailed more prepping beforehand: "Mommy might be able to still be there, I might not.")
And you know what? He did great! Rolled with it! Went with the flow! Awesome.
He also picked out a couple of goodies at the sale -- a cupcake and 2 cookies --that I don't know what they're made with, dairy-wise, but I'm going to take a cue from him and roll with it. He seems to tolerate baked goods better anyway. I was so happy that he first picked out one of our sesame cookies that he could've gotten away with anything just then! (And did...)
Yes, our cookie-baking went well yesterday. I measured every ingredient before he even got home, cracked the egg into a bowl, and put it on the table in order. He dumped everything into the bowl when I told him to, and stirred as much as he wanted (which was only a little bit). Then he rolled a few of the dough balls in the sesame seeds, and that was enough baking for him. But that was a lot.
He also. ALSO!! Ate a chicken-burger for dinner. The first time he's ever eaten a burger-type item at home! Huge deal. AND! He tolerated me telling him NOT to get another snack (or another sample cookie once they came out of the oven) before dinner. When he knew the dinner wasn't something he chose or would choose for himself! That is so huge.
Fingers crossed, because he's doing soo well, I hope I haven't just made a big frosted cupcakey mistake!!!
Turns out his class was scheduled to come this morning, so I was able to stay until they came. (That of course entailed more prepping beforehand: "Mommy might be able to still be there, I might not.")
And you know what? He did great! Rolled with it! Went with the flow! Awesome.
He also picked out a couple of goodies at the sale -- a cupcake and 2 cookies --that I don't know what they're made with, dairy-wise, but I'm going to take a cue from him and roll with it. He seems to tolerate baked goods better anyway. I was so happy that he first picked out one of our sesame cookies that he could've gotten away with anything just then! (And did...)
Yes, our cookie-baking went well yesterday. I measured every ingredient before he even got home, cracked the egg into a bowl, and put it on the table in order. He dumped everything into the bowl when I told him to, and stirred as much as he wanted (which was only a little bit). Then he rolled a few of the dough balls in the sesame seeds, and that was enough baking for him. But that was a lot.
He also. ALSO!! Ate a chicken-burger for dinner. The first time he's ever eaten a burger-type item at home! Huge deal. AND! He tolerated me telling him NOT to get another snack (or another sample cookie once they came out of the oven) before dinner. When he knew the dinner wasn't something he chose or would choose for himself! That is so huge.
Fingers crossed, because he's doing soo well, I hope I haven't just made a big frosted cupcakey mistake!!!
Monday, February 11, 2008
Making Cookies
DuckyBoy came home with a book made by his class, "Things We Like - Things That Make Us Happy." (It was only supposed to be titled the second part, he said, but A., one of the girls in his class, wrote the other as well. About which he was obviously still.slightly.peeved! Haha.)
Anyway, for some reason several pages showed mommies making cookies and kindergarten spellings, "I lik wen Mom bks cukeez." (Say it out loud.)
We read the book together and one of us commented about the multiples of the same thing and DuckyBoy says, "You never bake cookies."
Oh! Ohhhh! OHHH! I had to shelve that jab, which I know he didn't mean as a jab, just as his perception. So, it arose this morning in the shower, when I am thinking that I need to bake cookies today for tomorrow's bake sale.
It's true, I don't bake many cookies. For the fall bake sale I -- we -- made marshmallow-Cheerio pumpkins. And I made the Groundhog Day cookies after he went to bed one night.
Now, I love to bake and eat cookies, and I grew up loving that my mom baked cookies. So why don't I? Let me count the ways.
1. Because Daddy and I will eat most of the cookies I bake, and our waistlines don't need them.
2. Because cookies are not something I need to worry about you eating. You will eat, or at least consider trying, any cookie baked by anyone and I don't know that homemade-by-me gets any extra points in your book. You obviously know you needn't worry about getting any nutrition from cookies. And surprisingly enough there are plenty of shelf-stable baked goods without dairy ... Teddy Grahams being chief among them.
3. Because I'm too busy making the rest of your special-order diet, or thinking about what to get you to try next. Between the sensory/control issues and the dairy-free, I think about food, YOUR food, way more than is normal for a mom of a child your age. I haven't yet had time to thumb through the Jessica Seinfeld cookbook, but sneaking pureed veggies into brownies just doesn't thrill me. I've got to get you to eat more real food first, then I can sneak something extra into the desserts as well.
* My freezer has 3 types of french fries. Partly because the SuperTots are actually made from vegetables other than potatoes and you eat them because they're alphabet shaped; partly because I consider it a score that you also eat McCain Smiles, as they are more mashed potatoey than regular fries.
* Chicken nuggets (currently stocked with 2 brands because one "tasted chewy" a week ago and now you eat no protein at all except however much is found in egg noodles and, of course, peanut butter);
* Oyster crackers with (Tofutti) cream cheese. At least we moved away from the faces -- made with sprinkles and half a Cheerio for the mouth -- compared to that, the sandwiches are less laborious. Is it any wonder I need a new eyeglasses prescription?! However, adding a layer of sprinkles because you like to call them Krabby Patties makes them way less fun for me as a labor of love for your health.
4. Because whenever I am baking, you'd much rather being doing something else. Is it the autism or a control thing? I don't know, but it would be more fun if you wanted to help me. I know you like to do this stuff.
Tell you what, my son whom I love. When I can regularly cook something for my dinner, and that is also what you eat for your dinner, then I can start to make you cookies.
Meanwhile, there is at least one cookie recipe we've talked about baking together. I don't know how well Sesame Crisps will go over for the bake sale, but the important thing is we will make them together.
Post-Bake Sale Update: The sesame cookies were a success -- the toughest mom even asked me for the recipe!! And, amazingly, I was able to remember it off the top of my head. Wow.
Anyway, for some reason several pages showed mommies making cookies and kindergarten spellings, "I lik wen Mom bks cukeez." (Say it out loud.)
We read the book together and one of us commented about the multiples of the same thing and DuckyBoy says, "You never bake cookies."
Oh! Ohhhh! OHHH! I had to shelve that jab, which I know he didn't mean as a jab, just as his perception. So, it arose this morning in the shower, when I am thinking that I need to bake cookies today for tomorrow's bake sale.
It's true, I don't bake many cookies. For the fall bake sale I -- we -- made marshmallow-Cheerio pumpkins. And I made the Groundhog Day cookies after he went to bed one night.
Now, I love to bake and eat cookies, and I grew up loving that my mom baked cookies. So why don't I? Let me count the ways.
1. Because Daddy and I will eat most of the cookies I bake, and our waistlines don't need them.
2. Because cookies are not something I need to worry about you eating. You will eat, or at least consider trying, any cookie baked by anyone and I don't know that homemade-by-me gets any extra points in your book. You obviously know you needn't worry about getting any nutrition from cookies. And surprisingly enough there are plenty of shelf-stable baked goods without dairy ... Teddy Grahams being chief among them.
3. Because I'm too busy making the rest of your special-order diet, or thinking about what to get you to try next. Between the sensory/control issues and the dairy-free, I think about food, YOUR food, way more than is normal for a mom of a child your age. I haven't yet had time to thumb through the Jessica Seinfeld cookbook, but sneaking pureed veggies into brownies just doesn't thrill me. I've got to get you to eat more real food first, then I can sneak something extra into the desserts as well.
* My freezer has 3 types of french fries. Partly because the SuperTots are actually made from vegetables other than potatoes and you eat them because they're alphabet shaped; partly because I consider it a score that you also eat McCain Smiles, as they are more mashed potatoey than regular fries.
* Chicken nuggets (currently stocked with 2 brands because one "tasted chewy" a week ago and now you eat no protein at all except however much is found in egg noodles and, of course, peanut butter);
* Oyster crackers with (Tofutti) cream cheese. At least we moved away from the faces -- made with sprinkles and half a Cheerio for the mouth -- compared to that, the sandwiches are less laborious. Is it any wonder I need a new eyeglasses prescription?! However, adding a layer of sprinkles because you like to call them Krabby Patties makes them way less fun for me as a labor of love for your health.
4. Because whenever I am baking, you'd much rather being doing something else. Is it the autism or a control thing? I don't know, but it would be more fun if you wanted to help me. I know you like to do this stuff.
Tell you what, my son whom I love. When I can regularly cook something for my dinner, and that is also what you eat for your dinner, then I can start to make you cookies.
Meanwhile, there is at least one cookie recipe we've talked about baking together. I don't know how well Sesame Crisps will go over for the bake sale, but the important thing is we will make them together.
Post-Bake Sale Update: The sesame cookies were a success -- the toughest mom even asked me for the recipe!! And, amazingly, I was able to remember it off the top of my head. Wow.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Potato Chip Review
My thoughts on Kettle brand Spicy Thai potato chips: A bit thick for my tastes, and I thought the flavor tasted like something -- anything -- off the steam table at the local health food store. Must be the ginger? Too bad. I think I was hoping for a pad-thai flavor, which probably means I was wanting something peanutty. Probably.
But you need not take my word for it; read all the Slashfood reviews yourself. Since I didn't like them, I didn't read past the first page. But clearly people disagree with me.
But you need not take my word for it; read all the Slashfood reviews yourself. Since I didn't like them, I didn't read past the first page. But clearly people disagree with me.
Saturday, February 9, 2008
Holy Communion and Post-Mardi Gras Party
OK, so I learned a new phrase tonight, something like "transformational sacrament." A phrase for communion, meaning it is something that can change a person as or after they experience it, meaning it need not only be limited to those who have already professed belief in Jesus as the Son of God. So, as the conversation went, if someone asks, I can say I am more a follower of Jonathan Edwards' viewpoint on this than of Spurgeon. Whoever that is.
I learned that, and that my husband has acquired a sense of how to move to a beat, and another thing that it really means to be in community -- is for two 40-something men to escort an 80-year-old woman (who has had too much wine) home to her apartment, and love her enough as a sister of Christ to undress her and put her in bed -- shocked as they are by the whole thing!! God bless 'em.
I learned that, and that my husband has acquired a sense of how to move to a beat, and another thing that it really means to be in community -- is for two 40-something men to escort an 80-year-old woman (who has had too much wine) home to her apartment, and love her enough as a sister of Christ to undress her and put her in bed -- shocked as they are by the whole thing!! God bless 'em.
Friday, February 8, 2008
Holidaze
DuckyBoy asked me a week or so ago if we would be decorating for or celebrating Chinese New Year. We celebrate just about everything else -- and what we don't, they learn about at school -- so I suppose he thinks, Well, if it's a holiday, I guess we celebrate it! Wonder where Mommy keeps the decorations for this one...
I suppose he'll figure out eventually that we don't celebrate that one at home because, well, we're not Chinese. Kind of a subtle distinction between honoring someone else's holiday and celebrating it yourself -- especially when you're in kindergarten. It's one big party!! (Aside from the homework and the having.your.girlfriend.stolen.away.from.you drama and all that.)
And then this morning he's on to the next one: Wanted to know what we do for St. Patrick's Day. And then came the important part: whether or not he gets that holiday off from school. That's the BEST part about holidays!
Meanwhile, Happy Chinese New Year! DuckyBoy's class celebrated yesterday afternoon -- with paper lanterns, red envelopes full of candy, and I don't even know what-all else. Thanks, M! Sounds like all of Grandma's shopping was a big hit! As were the Starbusts.
I suppose he'll figure out eventually that we don't celebrate that one at home because, well, we're not Chinese. Kind of a subtle distinction between honoring someone else's holiday and celebrating it yourself -- especially when you're in kindergarten. It's one big party!! (Aside from the homework and the having.your.girlfriend.stolen.away.from.you drama and all that.)
And then this morning he's on to the next one: Wanted to know what we do for St. Patrick's Day. And then came the important part: whether or not he gets that holiday off from school. That's the BEST part about holidays!
Meanwhile, Happy Chinese New Year! DuckyBoy's class celebrated yesterday afternoon -- with paper lanterns, red envelopes full of candy, and I don't even know what-all else. Thanks, M! Sounds like all of Grandma's shopping was a big hit! As were the Starbusts.
Thursday, February 7, 2008
Do My ExtraBucks Make Me an Extra Sellout?
God,
Thank you for this blog and for my husband's giving me the nudge in the right direction to start it. Amen!
And now, for something completely different.
Anybody else get CVS Extra Bucks? I have a whopping $2 to spend. Brilliant marketing. Keeps me going there from time to time when my usual modus operandi is to pick up whatever I need from the pharmacy aisle at Stop & Shop and live without whatever I can't find. (Except my ob's. I look high and low for those ob's -- how could you let me down on something so vital, Stop & Shop??
Anyway. I have $2. But! But! In today's mail I got, as a birthday gift from my Close Personal Friends at the CVS corporation, an additional $3! That makes FIVE!
Now, I could go blow five bucks at CVS any time I wanted to. (Except some Fridays when I've gone to AC Moore earlier in the week.) But this is FREE MONEY! Who could resist.
So then I notice I've only got 2 Tylenols left. Need to buy them. Should I use my ExtraBucks and get free headache relief?
But.. that $3 is a Birthday Present! I don't wanna use it on something practical.
So do I buy the pills AND get myself something else with the ExtraBucks? That plays right into what CVS wants me to do, namely come in with free money and spend more than that? I don't mind playing their game but, well, I don't want to feel uuuuused.
I've got a few weeks before everything expires. I'll pick up more Tylenol the next time I'm at Stop & Shop, and hold the ExtraBucks for something more worthy of being obtained for free. A Purchase to be Named Later.
I obviously.do.not.have.enough.to.think.about.
Thank you for this blog and for my husband's giving me the nudge in the right direction to start it. Amen!
And now, for something completely different.
Anybody else get CVS Extra Bucks? I have a whopping $2 to spend. Brilliant marketing. Keeps me going there from time to time when my usual modus operandi is to pick up whatever I need from the pharmacy aisle at Stop & Shop and live without whatever I can't find. (Except my ob's. I look high and low for those ob's -- how could you let me down on something so vital, Stop & Shop??
Anyway. I have $2. But! But! In today's mail I got, as a birthday gift from my Close Personal Friends at the CVS corporation, an additional $3! That makes FIVE!
Now, I could go blow five bucks at CVS any time I wanted to. (Except some Fridays when I've gone to AC Moore earlier in the week.) But this is FREE MONEY! Who could resist.
So then I notice I've only got 2 Tylenols left. Need to buy them. Should I use my ExtraBucks and get free headache relief?
But.. that $3 is a Birthday Present! I don't wanna use it on something practical.
So do I buy the pills AND get myself something else with the ExtraBucks? That plays right into what CVS wants me to do, namely come in with free money and spend more than that? I don't mind playing their game but, well, I don't want to feel uuuuused.
I've got a few weeks before everything expires. I'll pick up more Tylenol the next time I'm at Stop & Shop, and hold the ExtraBucks for something more worthy of being obtained for free. A Purchase to be Named Later.
I obviously.do.not.have.enough.to.think.about.
Happy Happy Joy Joy Celery
Just in case the previous post left any suggestion that I am unhappy with DuckyBoy's teachers, I thought I'd tell the world that he ate CELERY yesterday! (de-strung by me before I dared pack it) entirely due to the efforts, I am sure, of his teachers. The peanut butter to dip it in helped, no doubt, as did the presence of the Snack Sticks to eat once he took a bite. But the point is that his teachers get big kudos from me!!
Feeling Like I'm the One in Kindergarten
Why do teachers have a way of writing suggestions that make me feel incompetent? We are having a bit of a go-round with DuckyBoy about breakfast.
The background:
We went through this earlier in the year, with him getting to school and bitterly complaining he was hungry (I imagine "Whiiiiine, grooooooooan, complaaaaaain as though he hasn't been fed in daaaaaaaays") -- even on days when he ATE.BREAKFAST.AT.HOME. Now, the school offers free hot and cold breakfast, but there aren't many choices he can have since almost everything has some type of dairy product in it. Especially, I've noticed, bulk foods for mass consumption: whey and powdered milk are cheap, filling, and using them keeps the dairy farms subsidized. I get it.
But this does not help my whiny son -- who probably gets to school, sees his classmates eating, and smells it, and wants some. He IS very suggestible foodwise-- if we read a book at bedtime that mentions food, he often remarks that he's still hungry -- even when he just had a snack. (Curse you, Amelia Bedelia! Just kidding. We love Amelia.)
If I were to fix and eat an elaborate breakfast each morning, he MIGHT eat something at home too. But then there's the time factor:
I get up at 6 AM. I consider this a **great sacrifice** I make for DuckyBoy's education. I don't understand why an 8:10 early period sounds like a good idea to anybody, but that's another story. From my own school-bus days as a country kid, I do understand why a 20-minute drive takes an hour on the school bus -- hence our pickup time of 7:10. So, fine.
I aim to get DB up at about 6:40. Should be 6:30 but in winter I have to dry my hair so I'm never quite ready. I also get his lunch and snack prepped by waiting to get him till 6:40 (or 6:45...). He's not very awake, and it takes most of that time to just help him wake up enough to tolerate clothing, shoes, a coat, and brushing his teeth and hair. HE.IS.NOT.HUNGRY.YET. Short of opening his mouth and shoving food in, I do everything I can to suggest, tempt, cajole, or just offer breakfast to this kid. Did I mention, he is not hungry yet?
For a few months he happily took a Pop-Tart to eat on the bus, and it seemed to last him until 10:30 snack time. About a week ago he was sick and I think it didn't taste good; now, he wants nothing to do with them, and I can't get him to want anything else.
So. Obviously his dramatic pleas for food tug on his teachers' heartstrings, and obviously they think I do not even try, since yesterday their note in part suggested frozen waffles or pancakes as an easy, quick breakfast idea -- stemming from the fact that they've been trying various foods at school, and DuckyBoy liked those things.
I HATE getting notes like that!! Because it completely discounts the possibility that maybe, just MAYBE, I have SCOURED the health food store for the flavor, shape and brand of dairy-free waffle (like Vans Maple Fusion) and anything else this kid MIGHT eat?
And that I REGULARLY check the labels of the big-name brands he sees ads for (Eggo, thanks a lot) to see if just maybe, this month, they have reformulated to remove the milk ingredients.
And that I DO cook extra waffles, pancakes, and French toast on the weekends and they sit untouched in the fridge until Friday when I finally eat them myself or throw them out.
In my reply note I tried not to sound too defensive, but I had to point out that not only does my freezer already contain quick and even somewhat healthy breakfasts, my fridge and cabinets do as well. In other words, which I did not say, I'm open to suggestions, but suggest something I can use!
I also always feel like they see me as this lazy slob -- "Ugh, lift a finger to make you breakfast? No way kid." When in fact I'd cook anything IF I thought he'd eat it. Really, I would.
Let's review. Slow eater. Sensory issues. Picky eater. Special diet. Just woke up. This is my fault HOW?????
The fact remains, he does need something in his stomach to get him through the first few hours of school. The rest of the note revealed that a discussion between DB and his teachers yielded a request for Rice Krispies, Corn Pops, and rice milk to have on hand. That, I replied, I can do.
The background:
We went through this earlier in the year, with him getting to school and bitterly complaining he was hungry (I imagine "Whiiiiine, grooooooooan, complaaaaaain as though he hasn't been fed in daaaaaaaays") -- even on days when he ATE.BREAKFAST.AT.HOME. Now, the school offers free hot and cold breakfast, but there aren't many choices he can have since almost everything has some type of dairy product in it. Especially, I've noticed, bulk foods for mass consumption: whey and powdered milk are cheap, filling, and using them keeps the dairy farms subsidized. I get it.
But this does not help my whiny son -- who probably gets to school, sees his classmates eating, and smells it, and wants some. He IS very suggestible foodwise-- if we read a book at bedtime that mentions food, he often remarks that he's still hungry -- even when he just had a snack. (Curse you, Amelia Bedelia! Just kidding. We love Amelia.)
If I were to fix and eat an elaborate breakfast each morning, he MIGHT eat something at home too. But then there's the time factor:
I get up at 6 AM. I consider this a **great sacrifice** I make for DuckyBoy's education. I don't understand why an 8:10 early period sounds like a good idea to anybody, but that's another story. From my own school-bus days as a country kid, I do understand why a 20-minute drive takes an hour on the school bus -- hence our pickup time of 7:10. So, fine.
I aim to get DB up at about 6:40. Should be 6:30 but in winter I have to dry my hair so I'm never quite ready. I also get his lunch and snack prepped by waiting to get him till 6:40 (or 6:45...). He's not very awake, and it takes most of that time to just help him wake up enough to tolerate clothing, shoes, a coat, and brushing his teeth and hair. HE.IS.NOT.HUNGRY.YET. Short of opening his mouth and shoving food in, I do everything I can to suggest, tempt, cajole, or just offer breakfast to this kid. Did I mention, he is not hungry yet?
For a few months he happily took a Pop-Tart to eat on the bus, and it seemed to last him until 10:30 snack time. About a week ago he was sick and I think it didn't taste good; now, he wants nothing to do with them, and I can't get him to want anything else.
So. Obviously his dramatic pleas for food tug on his teachers' heartstrings, and obviously they think I do not even try, since yesterday their note in part suggested frozen waffles or pancakes as an easy, quick breakfast idea -- stemming from the fact that they've been trying various foods at school, and DuckyBoy liked those things.
I HATE getting notes like that!! Because it completely discounts the possibility that maybe, just MAYBE, I have SCOURED the health food store for the flavor, shape and brand of dairy-free waffle (like Vans Maple Fusion) and anything else this kid MIGHT eat?
And that I REGULARLY check the labels of the big-name brands he sees ads for (Eggo, thanks a lot) to see if just maybe, this month, they have reformulated to remove the milk ingredients.
And that I DO cook extra waffles, pancakes, and French toast on the weekends and they sit untouched in the fridge until Friday when I finally eat them myself or throw them out.
In my reply note I tried not to sound too defensive, but I had to point out that not only does my freezer already contain quick and even somewhat healthy breakfasts, my fridge and cabinets do as well. In other words, which I did not say, I'm open to suggestions, but suggest something I can use!
I also always feel like they see me as this lazy slob -- "Ugh, lift a finger to make you breakfast? No way kid." When in fact I'd cook anything IF I thought he'd eat it. Really, I would.
Let's review. Slow eater. Sensory issues. Picky eater. Special diet. Just woke up. This is my fault HOW?????
The fact remains, he does need something in his stomach to get him through the first few hours of school. The rest of the note revealed that a discussion between DB and his teachers yielded a request for Rice Krispies, Corn Pops, and rice milk to have on hand. That, I replied, I can do.
Tuesday, February 5, 2008
Socks
Why do I hate to sort socks so much? Heck, I don't even have to sort them these days, thanks to the wonderfulness that is Melba, all I have to do is put the matched pairs away -- and I still don't like having to deal with them. Is it because I'm a Pisces? On the other hand (or foot, as it were), Virgo Duckyboy strips off his socks almost as soon as he gets home, and I don't like having shoes on inside.
It's also comparable to my dislike for sorting and putting away silverware. Lots of fiddly little pieces that seem like they will never end. Well, I bribed myself to put them all away by telling myself I could post this after I was done -- and only after!!
What's your least favorite household activity?
It's also comparable to my dislike for sorting and putting away silverware. Lots of fiddly little pieces that seem like they will never end. Well, I bribed myself to put them all away by telling myself I could post this after I was done -- and only after!!
What's your least favorite household activity?
The Power of the Ice Ring
Well, Duckyboy wasn't interested in reliving his party yesterday. Until bedtime, when he asked:
DB: "Why didn't we do the party again?"
Me: (Sweetest possible mom voice) "Because you didn't want to." (Resist urge to bang my head against the wall in frustration.)
DB: "Oh."
That means it makes sense, when he just says, "Oh."
But anyway, he did enjoy playing with the just-for-him ice ring. Didn't want to make more punch (Oh, WHERE did I go wrong??) but had a blast watching the ring melt. Good science lesson! He kept checking back on it in the bowl through the course of the evening: First he looked at the 2 colors and figured out that the darker side was more juice and the lighter side was more water (Mommy didn't mix the juice and water very well). Then as it melted he noticed the thinner side lost its shape first (I had to shove it in the freezer at kind of an angle; I'm sure Martha Stewart would cringe if she saw me entertain. Then again, I'm more secure than she is.) And finally he just watched the whole thing melt. Kept sticking his fingers in to touch it, too -- good OT/sensory stimulation!!
Yes, at this point I can spin anything I do with him so it can be seen with a educational and/or therapeutic bent. Yet if I try to consciously Teach the kid anything, he resists.
DB: "Why didn't we do the party again?"
Me: (Sweetest possible mom voice) "Because you didn't want to." (Resist urge to bang my head against the wall in frustration.)
DB: "Oh."
That means it makes sense, when he just says, "Oh."
But anyway, he did enjoy playing with the just-for-him ice ring. Didn't want to make more punch (Oh, WHERE did I go wrong??) but had a blast watching the ring melt. Good science lesson! He kept checking back on it in the bowl through the course of the evening: First he looked at the 2 colors and figured out that the darker side was more juice and the lighter side was more water (Mommy didn't mix the juice and water very well). Then as it melted he noticed the thinner side lost its shape first (I had to shove it in the freezer at kind of an angle; I'm sure Martha Stewart would cringe if she saw me entertain. Then again, I'm more secure than she is.) And finally he just watched the whole thing melt. Kept sticking his fingers in to touch it, too -- good OT/sensory stimulation!!
Yes, at this point I can spin anything I do with him so it can be seen with a educational and/or therapeutic bent. Yet if I try to consciously Teach the kid anything, he resists.
Monday, February 4, 2008
Groundhog Hangover
Now that my Very First Post is out of the way, here's what I wanted to say that made me go through the laborious process (not) of starting a blog. If I'd known it was that easy I'd have started one a long time ago; why didn't anyone tell me? Sheesh. Anyhoo..
I was doing dishes after reading blogs this morning and had this thought but it sounded, not to flatter myself, like someone else. So, since that person is a better writer than I think myself to be, I thought I'd write the thought down!
And then I wondered, do women who blog and read one another's have writing styles that gradually move closer together, like that menstrual-cycle thing where women who live or work together have cycles that gradually happen at the same time each month? Ah, thank you Internet, I found the name for it: "synchronous menstruation." So I guess this would be "synchronous musings."
Which brings its own set of musings, as it would appear that the jury is out on whether that synchronous periods are a real phenomenon or not. With most of the critics being men, and most of the women being all, "Duh."
And now I've quite forgotten my original brilliant thought. Oh, yes. The party. So, I had this kickass party for Duckyboy on Saturday. We had a Groundhog Day party, complete with banners (with groundhogs), games (with groundhogs), and snacks (shaped like or reminiscent of groundhogs and/or their burrows). Everyone who wasn't feverish or contagious was there, toys were strewn everywhere, Duckyboy now likes to say "It's not a party until someone's in their underwear" (me and my big mouth) and, I thought, a good time was had by all.
Until this morning. Now, Monday morning is always a bummer at our house, coming as it does on the heels of 2 days that involve lots of Mommy and very little homework, not so many rules, and little need to sit still and quietly for long periods of time without a TV on. Today's bummer began, as usual, with coaxing the poor kid out of bed at 6:40 am, and proceeded to a stint at the still-partified kitchen table and this:
DB: Mommy? Can I make a groundhog? [One of the crafts I had lovingly handcreated for son and his little friends.] I didn't get a chance to make one at the party.
Me: Expose chest. Insert knife into heart! Dissolve into sobbing mass on floor. Oh, wait, still have to get the kid on the bus in 5 minutes and he's not dressed yet... Of course, sweetie! I didn't realize you didn't make one!
(We'd made a sample together a couple of days beforehand; frankly, at the party, I forgot.)
We made one then and there. Yes, even before I made him get dressed. How could I possibly have put him on the bus without having made a groundhog???
DB: I tried to tell you, but you were too busy helping S. make hers.
He didn't tell me. I'm perceptive like that. He may have also been sitting there and if I was Truly A Good Mother it would have occurred to me that he wanted to make one too. But honestly, I don't even remember him sitting there.
Am therefore spending part of today trying to figure out how to make it up to him when he gets home. Reliving the party, with him as special guest, is ranking high on the list. Without the bagels though, since I've eaten or frozen all the rest. I will make punch -- any excuse to make punch! -- and even have his very own ice ring in the Bundt pan in the freezer.
That was a big hit, let me tell ya --want to intrigue a bunch of 5-year-olds? Float an ice ring, preferably one made from juice that's a different color than your punch, in a gigantic bowl of punch. (Hint: Plastic punch bowl from party store preferable.)
What? Punch-phobic? Pfft. Obviously you didn't grow up Methodist. Punch rules! Can't believe I haven't used my punch bowl since Duckyboy's first birthday party in '03 -- now I don't want to put it away. Again thank you, Internet, for the ideas for this punch:
Oh, and now in case someone's got something to say about that: My view is, at his age, I'd rather have him have a positive view of The Lord's Supper as something that is for him, as opposed to seeing it as something that he's not allowed to have, which is NOT, trust me, going to have a wistful, dreamy-eyed, "Gee, I hope I can have that someday" effect that it might on someone else's kid. I also let him eat the leftover matzoh. Well, not ALL of it since he'd never have a bm again. Whatever else is left we save to feed to the ducks in Kissena Park. Did you know that ducks like matzoh?
Well, I've written a paragraph that includes both my faith and ducks; I think my work here is done.
I was doing dishes after reading blogs this morning and had this thought but it sounded, not to flatter myself, like someone else. So, since that person is a better writer than I think myself to be, I thought I'd write the thought down!
And then I wondered, do women who blog and read one another's have writing styles that gradually move closer together, like that menstrual-cycle thing where women who live or work together have cycles that gradually happen at the same time each month? Ah, thank you Internet, I found the name for it: "synchronous menstruation." So I guess this would be "synchronous musings."
Which brings its own set of musings, as it would appear that the jury is out on whether that synchronous periods are a real phenomenon or not. With most of the critics being men, and most of the women being all, "Duh."
And now I've quite forgotten my original brilliant thought. Oh, yes. The party. So, I had this kickass party for Duckyboy on Saturday. We had a Groundhog Day party, complete with banners (with groundhogs), games (with groundhogs), and snacks (shaped like or reminiscent of groundhogs and/or their burrows). Everyone who wasn't feverish or contagious was there, toys were strewn everywhere, Duckyboy now likes to say "It's not a party until someone's in their underwear" (me and my big mouth) and, I thought, a good time was had by all.
Until this morning. Now, Monday morning is always a bummer at our house, coming as it does on the heels of 2 days that involve lots of Mommy and very little homework, not so many rules, and little need to sit still and quietly for long periods of time without a TV on. Today's bummer began, as usual, with coaxing the poor kid out of bed at 6:40 am, and proceeded to a stint at the still-partified kitchen table and this:
DB: Mommy? Can I make a groundhog? [One of the crafts I had lovingly handcreated for son and his little friends.] I didn't get a chance to make one at the party.
Me: Expose chest. Insert knife into heart! Dissolve into sobbing mass on floor. Oh, wait, still have to get the kid on the bus in 5 minutes and he's not dressed yet... Of course, sweetie! I didn't realize you didn't make one!
(We'd made a sample together a couple of days beforehand; frankly, at the party, I forgot.)
We made one then and there. Yes, even before I made him get dressed. How could I possibly have put him on the bus without having made a groundhog???
DB: I tried to tell you, but you were too busy helping S. make hers.
He didn't tell me. I'm perceptive like that. He may have also been sitting there and if I was Truly A Good Mother it would have occurred to me that he wanted to make one too. But honestly, I don't even remember him sitting there.
Am therefore spending part of today trying to figure out how to make it up to him when he gets home. Reliving the party, with him as special guest, is ranking high on the list. Without the bagels though, since I've eaten or frozen all the rest. I will make punch -- any excuse to make punch! -- and even have his very own ice ring in the Bundt pan in the freezer.
That was a big hit, let me tell ya --want to intrigue a bunch of 5-year-olds? Float an ice ring, preferably one made from juice that's a different color than your punch, in a gigantic bowl of punch. (Hint: Plastic punch bowl from party store preferable.)
What? Punch-phobic? Pfft. Obviously you didn't grow up Methodist. Punch rules! Can't believe I haven't used my punch bowl since Duckyboy's first birthday party in '03 -- now I don't want to put it away. Again thank you, Internet, for the ideas for this punch:
- 1 container orange juice (No Pulp! "X Pulp! We don't drink no stinkin' pulp," say my son and his sensory-issue-challenged friends. OK, so they don't use those words. Though he might say the "X pulp" part.) If it makes you feel any better, buy the calcium-added version. I felt a tad better about feeding it to my friends' kids that way.
- 1 2-liter container of lemon-lime soda. The more store-brand, the better.
- 1 ring of ice --water mixed with purple grape juice makes the orange pulp turn brown as it melts. (Which is good for Groundhog Day, even though I found that out by accident.)
Oh, and now in case someone's got something to say about that: My view is, at his age, I'd rather have him have a positive view of The Lord's Supper as something that is for him, as opposed to seeing it as something that he's not allowed to have, which is NOT, trust me, going to have a wistful, dreamy-eyed, "Gee, I hope I can have that someday" effect that it might on someone else's kid. I also let him eat the leftover matzoh. Well, not ALL of it since he'd never have a bm again. Whatever else is left we save to feed to the ducks in Kissena Park. Did you know that ducks like matzoh?
Well, I've written a paragraph that includes both my faith and ducks; I think my work here is done.
Post Number One-- No Pressure
This one's easy. I am starting this blog because there is a hole in the blogosphere -- I could say, Cheeky Lotus, this is all your fault. You took a hiatus, so what the heck else am I going to do once I get to the bottom of finslippy's blogroll? Actually start one of the projects that make me feel bad about not getting done? Oh no. This way I can waste more time on the internet, dontcha know.
Speaking of finslippy, this selection of blog style is for you, since I, well, admire ya and all. Not that you know me but I know you in that weird Internet way. And not to forget Kathy, for the record you told me -- oh, when was it, 2 years ago? -- that I oughta have a blog too. So, finally, enough of you stopped blogging and so all of you have made me do this. Humph. But I'm not really mad.
Speaking of finslippy, this selection of blog style is for you, since I, well, admire ya and all. Not that you know me but I know you in that weird Internet way. And not to forget Kathy, for the record you told me -- oh, when was it, 2 years ago? -- that I oughta have a blog too. So, finally, enough of you stopped blogging and so all of you have made me do this. Humph. But I'm not really mad.
