I started writing this for a songwriting contest. The deadline has passed, and I wasn't impressed with this as a song. But I like it as a poem.
I wish you’d know
How much I love you.
I wish I could see
Into the future
And know how you think of me
When I’m not here.
Will you look back and smile
And remember the love
In each lunchbox note
And each kiss and each midnight hug
Or will you remember
The times I said no,
The times I was too tired to read one more book,
The times I had to take care of myself?
You don’t think the way other people do
You see connections we don’t see
You also see connections that aren’t there
Like when we laugh and you think we’re laughing at you
So I’m afraid you’ll remember the wrong things
I do as much as I can of the right things
And hope you feel it in your heart.
Monday, September 29, 2008
Wednesday, September 24, 2008
New Job: Stylist
I helped with Picture Day at DuckyBoy's school today. Not very impressive, these school photographers. The sales rep was all rosy - "oh, we're trying something new... basically one seasoned pro plus 2 newbies, the old hand is here to make sure they're doing the right things."
Actually, the pro was doing a third of the work, and the other 2 were on their own. Sure, if they got stuck or needed help they could consult him, but it's not like he was watching them. At all.
They were three all about the same -- as I said on my other blog, the one guy thought TALKING LOUDER was the way to get the autistic kids to cooperate (not that he knew they were autistic, but don'tcha have a clue?; the others paid no attention to collars, necklaces askew, or mussed hair.
I was able to spend time for a few classes to do the styling-- even got to tie one kid's tie (do you really send your 4th grader to school without his tie tied and just hope someone can tie it??). But isn't that their job? Guess not.
Well, retake day is already set for November! We'll see how the retake rate is.
Actually, the pro was doing a third of the work, and the other 2 were on their own. Sure, if they got stuck or needed help they could consult him, but it's not like he was watching them. At all.
They were three all about the same -- as I said on my other blog, the one guy thought TALKING LOUDER was the way to get the autistic kids to cooperate (not that he knew they were autistic, but don'tcha have a clue?; the others paid no attention to collars, necklaces askew, or mussed hair.
I was able to spend time for a few classes to do the styling-- even got to tie one kid's tie (do you really send your 4th grader to school without his tie tied and just hope someone can tie it??). But isn't that their job? Guess not.
Well, retake day is already set for November! We'll see how the retake rate is.
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
Making Money
I started taking a tele-class last night on making money with articles. Primarily it's for the business that Husband and I are working together on, but I see lots of applications for my blog(s) content as well. Interesting to get deeper into the world of the Web.
Affiliates are a big thing: so I talk about a book, and have a link to Amazon, but it's not just A link, it's MY link, and if you click through to it and happen to buy, I get a commission.
This is crazy! But, fair warning, I'm going to try it out. You may get bored with all my pent-up product reviews I heretofore have not felt were worth bothering anyone else with. Now, maybe it's worth seeing if anyone likes my recommendations!
Affiliates are a big thing: so I talk about a book, and have a link to Amazon, but it's not just A link, it's MY link, and if you click through to it and happen to buy, I get a commission.
This is crazy! But, fair warning, I'm going to try it out. You may get bored with all my pent-up product reviews I heretofore have not felt were worth bothering anyone else with. Now, maybe it's worth seeing if anyone likes my recommendations!
Friday, September 19, 2008
Haiku for a Weekend Off
Don't know what to 'ku
Date weekend for me and hub
Nice to have a break.
Love me my DB,
But need some time off sometimes
to sleep in and veg.
I had a great time volunteering for the 2nd week at DB's school today, now I'm "Mrs. H" (for DB's last name) and I get to help pre-k, K and one 1st grade class (which has lots of kids I know from DB's class last year) with their craft, and I love it.
Who knew?
Oh, and rereading this I feel I should clarify, DB is at this grandparents' this weekend getting him some serious spoiling.
Date weekend for me and hub
Nice to have a break.
Love me my DB,
But need some time off sometimes
to sleep in and veg.
I had a great time volunteering for the 2nd week at DB's school today, now I'm "Mrs. H" (for DB's last name) and I get to help pre-k, K and one 1st grade class (which has lots of kids I know from DB's class last year) with their craft, and I love it.
Who knew?
Oh, and rereading this I feel I should clarify, DB is at this grandparents' this weekend getting him some serious spoiling.
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
People I Dislike
In the past 43 years I can't remember meeting anyone I seriously disliked. In 2008, so far, I've met 2. Two! What's that say?
Good Behavior Update
I don't think DB's good behavior is related to it's the head injury. I think he has a cold.
Monday, September 15, 2008
Pickles and Honey and Bumps on the Head
Db hit his head on a tow truck Friday afternoon.
How is THAT possible, you ask? OK, picture this:
It's raining hard. He's wearing his oversize Mets jacket with the hood up. He's still got his patch on. (That reminds me, I forgot his patch this morning. Don't care.) He's not really looking where he's going.
The tow truck was parked at the corner. The iron cross bar sticks out at a 45-degree angle at a height of, I now know, about 42 inches.
I had crossed the street ahead of him (it's a quiet street) and was encouraging him to come along and stop looking at whatever he was looking at. His body moved before his head turned and
The first thing he said after he stopped crying was, "Will it be better when I'm a grownup?" Later he said something about "the truck that broke my forehead."
Poor guy.
Needless to say, he wasn't too interested in doing gymnastics after that.
We went inside anyway, mainly because it was pouring rain, and he watched part of the class and played with his friend P (whose sisters take that class) for a bit, then we left.
He didn't black out, he never took that long-nap they warn you about following head injury, yet... I still worry.
I grew up with the mindset of, "If it's not life-threating, there's no reason to go to the doctor." So I'm not the type to drag him to the pediatrician when there's probably nothing they can do.
But I wonder -- because, oddly enough, he was Really Good all weekend. Doesn't that qualify as an uncharacteristic behavior change?
Now, he may have been really good due it it being Birthday Party day (Saturday) and Sunday he had lots of new stimulation from all his new presents. Very possible.
But we also took him to Pickle Day on the Lower East Side, and he tolerated being there and even tried some honey and wanted to buy some.
Last night he said, as he laid in bed, that he was dizzy. How can you be dizzy lying in bed? So I figured it was that dropping-off-to-sleep dizziness. Then he was hot. But fever doesn't show up as a symptom of head injury. (And my Google search about pediatric head injury symptoms didn't give me anything, really, to worry about.)
Then this morning, everything worked right. He woke up and I was right there but didn't startle him. He roused himself, told me he was waking up enough to get up, got his classes, and said "I'm ready," then sat up and headed to the playroom. His bus was late so we had time to do everything: Tell a story (the usual); eat his marshmallow bar; and have a race. We said after we did all that if the bus hadn't arrived, I'd drive him, but just as we finished, the bus pulled up ... and he was OK with it. Amazing.
How sad is it that my delight is tempered with, "Is he OK?"
How is THAT possible, you ask? OK, picture this:
It's raining hard. He's wearing his oversize Mets jacket with the hood up. He's still got his patch on. (That reminds me, I forgot his patch this morning. Don't care.) He's not really looking where he's going.
The tow truck was parked at the corner. The iron cross bar sticks out at a 45-degree angle at a height of, I now know, about 42 inches.
I had crossed the street ahead of him (it's a quiet street) and was encouraging him to come along and stop looking at whatever he was looking at. His body moved before his head turned and
****W-H-A-M!*****
The first thing he said after he stopped crying was, "Will it be better when I'm a grownup?" Later he said something about "the truck that broke my forehead."
Poor guy.
Needless to say, he wasn't too interested in doing gymnastics after that.
We went inside anyway, mainly because it was pouring rain, and he watched part of the class and played with his friend P (whose sisters take that class) for a bit, then we left.
He didn't black out, he never took that long-nap they warn you about following head injury, yet... I still worry.
I grew up with the mindset of, "If it's not life-threating, there's no reason to go to the doctor." So I'm not the type to drag him to the pediatrician when there's probably nothing they can do.
But I wonder -- because, oddly enough, he was Really Good all weekend. Doesn't that qualify as an uncharacteristic behavior change?
Now, he may have been really good due it it being Birthday Party day (Saturday) and Sunday he had lots of new stimulation from all his new presents. Very possible.
But we also took him to Pickle Day on the Lower East Side, and he tolerated being there and even tried some honey and wanted to buy some.
Last night he said, as he laid in bed, that he was dizzy. How can you be dizzy lying in bed? So I figured it was that dropping-off-to-sleep dizziness. Then he was hot. But fever doesn't show up as a symptom of head injury. (And my Google search about pediatric head injury symptoms didn't give me anything, really, to worry about.)
Then this morning, everything worked right. He woke up and I was right there but didn't startle him. He roused himself, told me he was waking up enough to get up, got his classes, and said "I'm ready," then sat up and headed to the playroom. His bus was late so we had time to do everything: Tell a story (the usual); eat his marshmallow bar; and have a race. We said after we did all that if the bus hadn't arrived, I'd drive him, but just as we finished, the bus pulled up ... and he was OK with it. Amazing.
How sad is it that my delight is tempered with, "Is he OK?"
Saturday, September 13, 2008
Wow, Great Party!
We just had DB's 3rd-of-3 birthday parties for the year. Do ya think he's turned 6 enough?
I actually think this was a good year to celebrate a lot. So far he's doing really well adjusting to school. First week was a bit rough, but now that week 2 is behind him, he seems to be getting into the swing of things.
We've got a printed list of what we need to accomplish in the mornings (which helps me as much as, if not more than, it does him), he has a nice long swim lesson with another student, a girl who's a better swimmer than he is -- good for the stretch! We're getting the breakfast-snack-lunch components tweaked so he's not complaining of being hungry in the mornings (why are wholesome foods so expensive? I spend $100 at the grocery store, then pick up a few things at the health food store and it's another $50!) And he's already had one social story come home about being flexible re: who walks him from the bus to class in the mornings.
Oh, and no early session on Fridays, so he gets to watch tv and take a little more time getting ready one day a week. (I wanted that last year, but they slotted in an OT session he wasn't supposed to miss.)
And while a bump on the head yesterday stopped him from getting back into the swing of things at gymnastics, at least he was there for a few minutes (while he recovered; he bumped his head across the street from the gym) in prep for being there Today! For! His! Party!
I was a bit of a crazy person this morning; I baked his cake(s) last night but had to cut and frost them into a bear today, and we had an appointment at the accountant (is there a prize for being the last people to file your '07 taxes?) at 9:30 and I had this idea we had to leave at 1 for the party.
Fortunately, around 11 am I realized our party did not start until 4:00, so I had a chance to relax. (Once I called the restaurant we were ordering chicken satay from and corrected the pickup time from 1:00 to 3:00!)
And at least the cake was all done!
{Edited to add: I'm so proud of my cake
I uploaded it to the Website
that gave me the idea, Coolest Birthday Cakes.}
So, Party. DB did great; when he needed a break from the noise and activity, he took one; he sat on a rocking toy by himself, or came out into the vestibule for a drink, and about 5 minutes before the end of the gym portion, which is long -- an hour! -- he simply staked his claim at the table in front of a slice of pizza and waited for everyone else to join him.
It's nice to go somewhere that the staff knows your child, and lets him do what he needs to do. As they do in class, they encourage him to rejoin the group, but don't see the need to force it during a party.
Sure, there were a couple of glitches. We did Bears2Go along with the gym, and the first thing they do is color the shopping bag they'll put their bear in. He was anxious, probably just because I wasn't in the room with him, and needed to be sure I'd help him stuff his bear. Once reassured, he wrote his name and a couple of cute happy drawings on his bag.
Since we've attended other parties there, he's been waiting for his turn to be "in the parachute" --the b'day kid gets tossed around. So when the parachute came out, DB wanted to hop into the center right away, but they had a few warm-ups to do first. He had a hard time listening to that answer, and waiting, but after a few stern words from me (I basically said, "You can calm down and wait, or we can go home ... ") he dealt with it.
And then he was great. Even rolled in the big circle (hard to describe...)
ate pizza-with-the-cheese-removed (his choice to have regular pizza be the food -- it's what everybody serves, so I think he just wanted the whole package), tolerated the always-off-key rendition of Happy Birthday, blew out his candle -- didn't even wig out when the candle blew out as the cake was placed in front of him, just waited --waited!! -- while it was relit, blew it out, ate a bit of cake, WOW.
As I write it all down, I'm blown away. And I even got a super-nice compliment from Husband that I did a great job with the party.
This was a big expense that we agreed to and then promptly lost our steady source of income. I'm glad we did it. I like having parties at home, will happily continue them in the future, but this was really special.
And the look on those little girls' faces when they got to pick a Unicorn!! With Heart-shaped Feet! to stuff? Absolutely Priceless.
I actually think this was a good year to celebrate a lot. So far he's doing really well adjusting to school. First week was a bit rough, but now that week 2 is behind him, he seems to be getting into the swing of things.
We've got a printed list of what we need to accomplish in the mornings (which helps me as much as, if not more than, it does him), he has a nice long swim lesson with another student, a girl who's a better swimmer than he is -- good for the stretch! We're getting the breakfast-snack-lunch components tweaked so he's not complaining of being hungry in the mornings (why are wholesome foods so expensive? I spend $100 at the grocery store, then pick up a few things at the health food store and it's another $50!) And he's already had one social story come home about being flexible re: who walks him from the bus to class in the mornings.
Oh, and no early session on Fridays, so he gets to watch tv and take a little more time getting ready one day a week. (I wanted that last year, but they slotted in an OT session he wasn't supposed to miss.)
And while a bump on the head yesterday stopped him from getting back into the swing of things at gymnastics, at least he was there for a few minutes (while he recovered; he bumped his head across the street from the gym) in prep for being there Today! For! His! Party!
I was a bit of a crazy person this morning; I baked his cake(s) last night but had to cut and frost them into a bear today, and we had an appointment at the accountant (is there a prize for being the last people to file your '07 taxes?) at 9:30 and I had this idea we had to leave at 1 for the party.
Fortunately, around 11 am I realized our party did not start until 4:00, so I had a chance to relax. (Once I called the restaurant we were ordering chicken satay from and corrected the pickup time from 1:00 to 3:00!)
And at least the cake was all done!
{Edited to add: I'm so proud of my cake
I uploaded it to the Website
that gave me the idea, Coolest Birthday Cakes.}
So, Party. DB did great; when he needed a break from the noise and activity, he took one; he sat on a rocking toy by himself, or came out into the vestibule for a drink, and about 5 minutes before the end of the gym portion, which is long -- an hour! -- he simply staked his claim at the table in front of a slice of pizza and waited for everyone else to join him.
It's nice to go somewhere that the staff knows your child, and lets him do what he needs to do. As they do in class, they encourage him to rejoin the group, but don't see the need to force it during a party.
Sure, there were a couple of glitches. We did Bears2Go along with the gym, and the first thing they do is color the shopping bag they'll put their bear in. He was anxious, probably just because I wasn't in the room with him, and needed to be sure I'd help him stuff his bear. Once reassured, he wrote his name and a couple of cute happy drawings on his bag.
Since we've attended other parties there, he's been waiting for his turn to be "in the parachute" --the b'day kid gets tossed around. So when the parachute came out, DB wanted to hop into the center right away, but they had a few warm-ups to do first. He had a hard time listening to that answer, and waiting, but after a few stern words from me (I basically said, "You can calm down and wait, or we can go home ... ") he dealt with it.
And then he was great. Even rolled in the big circle (hard to describe...)
ate pizza-with-the-cheese-removed (his choice to have regular pizza be the food -- it's what everybody serves, so I think he just wanted the whole package), tolerated the always-off-key rendition of Happy Birthday, blew out his candle -- didn't even wig out when the candle blew out as the cake was placed in front of him, just waited --waited!! -- while it was relit, blew it out, ate a bit of cake, WOW.
As I write it all down, I'm blown away. And I even got a super-nice compliment from Husband that I did a great job with the party.
This was a big expense that we agreed to and then promptly lost our steady source of income. I'm glad we did it. I like having parties at home, will happily continue them in the future, but this was really special.
And the look on those little girls' faces when they got to pick a Unicorn!! With Heart-shaped Feet! to stuff? Absolutely Priceless.
Friday, September 12, 2008
Happy Haiku Friday!
Well, here's my week in a nutshell (if haikus fit in nutshells. What's a Japanese nut?)
A new thing today,
working the school library,
a regular gig.
Fridays are better
with a later-hour start;
wanted this last year!
Big party weekend --
Hub worried about cost but --
It's already spent.
Doing our startup,
'07 taxes still due,
Got to trust the Lord.
A new thing today,
working the school library,
a regular gig.
Fridays are better
with a later-hour start;
wanted this last year!
Big party weekend --
Hub worried about cost but --
It's already spent.
Doing our startup,
'07 taxes still due,
Got to trust the Lord.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
Words of Wisdom for the Day
"Never go with a hippie to a second location."
-Alec Baldwin (his character), 30 Rock
How have I not been watching this show? It's hysterical!
and then there's this, from Sharon at Motherhood: The Ultimate Survivor:
"It’s not that I don't care and I’m not trying to keep it all together. It's just that I'm trying harder to keep it all from falling apart."
I read her whole post Our Messy House and laughed so hard I cried. My favorite part was the faces on the acorns, because that sounds like me.
-Alec Baldwin (his character), 30 Rock
How have I not been watching this show? It's hysterical!
and then there's this, from Sharon at Motherhood: The Ultimate Survivor:
"It’s not that I don't care and I’m not trying to keep it all together. It's just that I'm trying harder to keep it all from falling apart."
I read her whole post Our Messy House and laughed so hard I cried. My favorite part was the faces on the acorns, because that sounds like me.
Saturday, September 6, 2008
Mets Game Rained Out
Poor me, I am watching the rain lash the window at the exact time when the Mets game I bought tickets for is supposed to be starting. I have never, ever bought tickets before, so the one day I do, and actually DID it, decided I would get my native-New-Yorker son to a game at Shea before it gets torn down forever, we get a Tropical Storm??!! Geez.
Anyway the game has been rescheduled for an earlier-afternoon start tomorrow, which is probably better all around. But had I known that before 2 pm, I wouldn't have let him watch TV the ENTIRE morning. I'd have dragged his butt outside for some fresh air before the rain and wind started. As it is, we had enough time for a quick trip to the park anyway. Nice to live right next door like that.
I also would not have spent as much time interacting with him all morning, since I am now Sick Of It and want time to myself, whilst he of course wants more, more, more Mommy. More Mommy Is Always Better.
Husband is, of course, watching television. That's his idea of child care, letting DB watch TV (actually technically DB is on the laptop) while he watches TV. And does anyone wonder why I interact with DB so much? If it weren't for me the kid would get no interaction at all! And so our family afternoon consists of the 3 of us in 3 different rooms in front of 3 different screens.
I told Husband to call me on his cell phone if he wants me; I'm tired of the both of them calling out to me from a different room when they want to tell me something. "I want to tell you something, but it's not important enough for ME to get up and find YOU; you stop what you are doing and come to me." I'm fed up with that.
To his credit, DB came to me just now to tell me about the site he's on.
I worry about him being on the Internet with out one of us in the room, but so far he's still site-based and game/activity-based, like Playhouse Disney or PBS kids, but I still check in from time to time. If I sat with him and also watched every show with him the way I'd feel most comfortable (the way I used to when he first started to use both these mediums), I'd have no free time at all during his waking hours. None.
Anyway the game has been rescheduled for an earlier-afternoon start tomorrow, which is probably better all around. But had I known that before 2 pm, I wouldn't have let him watch TV the ENTIRE morning. I'd have dragged his butt outside for some fresh air before the rain and wind started. As it is, we had enough time for a quick trip to the park anyway. Nice to live right next door like that.
I also would not have spent as much time interacting with him all morning, since I am now Sick Of It and want time to myself, whilst he of course wants more, more, more Mommy. More Mommy Is Always Better.
Husband is, of course, watching television. That's his idea of child care, letting DB watch TV (actually technically DB is on the laptop) while he watches TV. And does anyone wonder why I interact with DB so much? If it weren't for me the kid would get no interaction at all! And so our family afternoon consists of the 3 of us in 3 different rooms in front of 3 different screens.
I told Husband to call me on his cell phone if he wants me; I'm tired of the both of them calling out to me from a different room when they want to tell me something. "I want to tell you something, but it's not important enough for ME to get up and find YOU; you stop what you are doing and come to me." I'm fed up with that.
To his credit, DB came to me just now to tell me about the site he's on.
I worry about him being on the Internet with out one of us in the room, but so far he's still site-based and game/activity-based, like Playhouse Disney or PBS kids, but I still check in from time to time. If I sat with him and also watched every show with him the way I'd feel most comfortable (the way I used to when he first started to use both these mediums), I'd have no free time at all during his waking hours. None.
Friday, September 5, 2008
Logos
Dear Stop and Shop,
Why do you ask me to fill out the consumer surveys if you're not going to listen to me? I TOLD you that your logo did not need to be changed, but did you listen? No. You changed it anyway.
Of the ones you had me evaluate, at least you picked the one I liked. Really, it was the only one that made any sense, the others were ridiculously off-target.
But my son is very unhappy! Why change a perfectly good, vehicle-related, red-light green-light logo for one that looks like, **heavy sigh**, a salad bowl?? You understand how this makes no sense to a 6-year-old wheels nut.
On the upside, your new logo is saving me money since DB now insists on buying your store brand as much as possible, since the packages still have the old logo on them. I'm sure I will be reusing them until the cardboard falls to pieces and then taping the boxes together to continue to hold graham crackers until he graduates from high school. Thanks a lot.
Also, I am still waiting to be the one who wins the $100 grocery money for filling out the surveys. Surely it's going to be my turn soon. If you'd prefer, I'd be happy to be the groceries-for-a-year winner in honor of the new look. I'll even take back what I said. Well, maybe not. But I'll say something nice about the bowl.
And, since it's Haiku Friday, I'll try to 'ku it:
Oh dear Stop & Shop,
why must you introduce change
don't you know our pain?
Why do you ask me to fill out the consumer surveys if you're not going to listen to me? I TOLD you that your logo did not need to be changed, but did you listen? No. You changed it anyway.
Of the ones you had me evaluate, at least you picked the one I liked. Really, it was the only one that made any sense, the others were ridiculously off-target.
But my son is very unhappy! Why change a perfectly good, vehicle-related, red-light green-light logo for one that looks like, **heavy sigh**, a salad bowl?? You understand how this makes no sense to a 6-year-old wheels nut.
On the upside, your new logo is saving me money since DB now insists on buying your store brand as much as possible, since the packages still have the old logo on them. I'm sure I will be reusing them until the cardboard falls to pieces and then taping the boxes together to continue to hold graham crackers until he graduates from high school. Thanks a lot.
Also, I am still waiting to be the one who wins the $100 grocery money for filling out the surveys. Surely it's going to be my turn soon. If you'd prefer, I'd be happy to be the groceries-for-a-year winner in honor of the new look. I'll even take back what I said. Well, maybe not. But I'll say something nice about the bowl.
And, since it's Haiku Friday, I'll try to 'ku it:
Oh dear Stop & Shop,
why must you introduce change
don't you know our pain?
Tuesday, September 2, 2008
Contrasts
Same beach (basically), but two very different experiences. His issues? My expectations? The presence of dad? Probably a combination of factors. You be the judge:
Part 1.
On Friday afternoon DuckyBoy and I went to one of the big state parks near us, Jones Beach, just to get to the beach once this summer. We went to the nature center first, since I was pretty sure he'd like that. Since we got there late in the day, we had the place to ourselves; he got to help the ranger feed the turtles (and I fed a live cricket to the toads), we also saw frogs and mussels and a starfish (who was eating a mussel -- very cool), played with the puppets, and he was pretty good about walking the boardwalk they have set up around the dunes. Not much to see, so I'm sure it wasn't his thing, but he didn't complain too much. We dug around outside in the sand in the "bone yard" they had set up, he was into that as well.
He must have been getting hungry since he asked the ranger if she had anything to eat; she didn't, but showed us what other part of the park to go to.
We were the next-to-last car to leave the nature center; they block off the entrance at that time of day, so we were sort of "locked in"; he liked that, and even said, "Being closed in the nature center makes me feel ... fun."
Then we headed down the parkway to the beach with the Friendly's concession. Silly me, I was looking for an actual Friendly's so at first I missed it, but we doubled back and found the right place.
By then it really was his dinner time, so the first thing we did was order nuggets and fries, which they had (scoring big points with DB), then picked a spot on the beach to spread out our blanket and eat them. Our spot was pretty close to the concessions, but I didn't think that mattered; we were there just to be there, I had no expectations. I didn't even care if we went in the water.
So, he ate and we watched the seagulls inch closer and closer. I love to make up conversations with the animals -- "I'm just being neighborly, standing here close by in case you need to throw away a french fry, I'm here for ya," -- that kind of thing. I drew a circle in the sand around the blanket and told the gulls to stay behind it, which tickled DB to watch them inch up to it ... and, to our surprise, not cross it! Which elicited much laughter on both our parts.
And then, we ran into friends we haven't seen in, like, a year, and spent an hour or so with them, closer to the water. DB built a sand castle, we told a story about the miniature king and queen (and all the princes and princesses and ladies in waiting and knights and cooks and butlers) who lived there. He LOVED telling a story with a REAL prop right in front of us. LOVED it.
So, all in all, a great afternoon. Just 3 hours, we never even put our swimsuits on, and it didn't matter.
Part 2.
I had such a good time with him that I wanted to go again on the weekend. So we went back on Sunday, with Husband too, good sport that he is to brave the area's most popular state park on a holiday weekend afternoon. It wasn't overly crowded, but the parking lot was full for the beach we'd gone to on Friday so we chose another, with a much further walk to the water.
Well.
As soon as we arrived, DB started to ask when we could get nuggets and fries. Now, Husband and I have had.it.up.to.here with this kid's proclivity to eat tiny bits of food at mealtimes and then be Insistently.Hungry.Again in, like, 2 hours. So we weren't in the mood to pay to feed him when we'd just eaten lunch an hour before. He couldn't have been THAT hungry. I figured it was more his trying to recreate the routine from Friday.
Since the concession/showers building was far from the water, we needed to put our suits on before spreading out the blanket and settling down. Well, he didn't want to put on his suit. Poor Husband had to deal with that one. Didn't help anyone's mood.
Once that was accomplished, we headed across the sand. He wanted to pick a spot right near the building (partly repeating the routine, partly he hates to walk.) Husband and I wanted to go in the water, so we made him trudge. Whine, moan, complain, can we get Friendly's. Can we get Friendly's.
It was a far enough walk that we weren't looking forward to making a special trip back up to the building just to get him the food, especially since we still didn't think he was THAT hungry, so we said we'd get it LATER.
Oh, geez. Too vague. Whine, whine, whiiiiiiiine; it was so bad that Husband and I jointly stopped more than once and contemplated going right back home. (We're rarely on the same page like that, so that was actually good for our relationship, though we'd of course rather not have been having to deal with it at all!)
We told DB, and reminded him it would NOT be fun-n-games with Mommy at home, or relaxin'-with-the-TV; he'd be in his room, alone. So he had to pick. He did his best to complain less.
So, finally, we get near to the water and get the blanket set up, and his sand castle building stuff, which he was looking foward to on the ride out. And he's STILL asking about those d*mn nuggets and fries!
Then Husband went in the water and pronounced it cold. OK, so he went in a little later, and I coax DB down to the water's edge (he only walks on the sand with his Crocs on, mind you). I tell him he just has to get his feet wet, he's whining and complaining about that. I tell him no nuggets and fries unless he gets his feet wet. He still is close to freaking out.
Finally his feet get wet, it's not sooo bad, then we tell him he can stand or sit on the edge while Husband and I go in just a little. Like, literally, not even up to my waist. I just wanted part of me in the water, so I could tolerate his fuss, fuss, fuss by the seaside. Fine, whatever.
Then, suddenly, he's screaming; there were flies on the water's edge and he got bit, since, duh, he's standing still! I know I should be more sympathetic but I just am not. *Sigh.*
Anyway, that got us out of the water and back to the blanket, where not only does he want to drink my lemonade instead of his specially-picked root beer, but he also wants to sit.on.my.lap.
Yes, the child will turn 6 years old tomorrow, and he wants to sit on my flippin' lap at the beach. Husband nixed that for me, which I appreciated since I don't know how to say no.
And again he's asking about the nuggets and fries. We finally had to use our standard ultimatum, which is: "We know you want them. You know we're going to take care of you. So if you ask about it again, you don't get it." And we got out the Pringles, which helped too.
So then he settled down a bit and directed me on making a sand castle for him. (This is a running joke with Husband now, that DB is the Executive and I am the Do-er; like this morning DB said, "Let's tell a story about a car, it's his first day of first grade but he is scared. Not like me, I am not scared." And then he sits back and expects me to tell the tale.)
And so, I made a sand castle. He turned out to be interested in the sand underwater at the bottom of the pail, and the bits of shells and whatever we could find to float in the water; "a miniature beach!" he called it.
So, OK, he's interested in something beach related, I'm happy.
And, since the sun was bright and we didn't know about the umbrella rentals back at the building until after we'd trekked to the water, we didn't stay too long, us with our Germanic-Scottish pale pink skin.
He was good about not being able to take the "miniature beach" with us, pouring it out when we left. After much discussion, he also seemed to like stepping on the day's sand castle; Friday's we had left as-is. (So it was just as well we didn't return to the same beach to find it gone!)
Finally, finally, he got his nuggets and fries, and didn't even complain about standing in line with me for it. He was happy to eat it on the way home -- even suggested that himself -- and ate a good amount of it, too.
But geez, Husband and I were pretty emotionally drained!
On the upside, though, we Got To The Beach As a Family Once. And the day after, sounds like the water was closed and even some of the parking lots at Jones Beach, due to tropical-storm related high tides. So we went on the right day, for Husband and me anyway!
Part 1.
On Friday afternoon DuckyBoy and I went to one of the big state parks near us, Jones Beach, just to get to the beach once this summer. We went to the nature center first, since I was pretty sure he'd like that. Since we got there late in the day, we had the place to ourselves; he got to help the ranger feed the turtles (and I fed a live cricket to the toads), we also saw frogs and mussels and a starfish (who was eating a mussel -- very cool), played with the puppets, and he was pretty good about walking the boardwalk they have set up around the dunes. Not much to see, so I'm sure it wasn't his thing, but he didn't complain too much. We dug around outside in the sand in the "bone yard" they had set up, he was into that as well.
He must have been getting hungry since he asked the ranger if she had anything to eat; she didn't, but showed us what other part of the park to go to.
We were the next-to-last car to leave the nature center; they block off the entrance at that time of day, so we were sort of "locked in"; he liked that, and even said, "Being closed in the nature center makes me feel ... fun."
Then we headed down the parkway to the beach with the Friendly's concession. Silly me, I was looking for an actual Friendly's so at first I missed it, but we doubled back and found the right place.
By then it really was his dinner time, so the first thing we did was order nuggets and fries, which they had (scoring big points with DB), then picked a spot on the beach to spread out our blanket and eat them. Our spot was pretty close to the concessions, but I didn't think that mattered; we were there just to be there, I had no expectations. I didn't even care if we went in the water.
So, he ate and we watched the seagulls inch closer and closer. I love to make up conversations with the animals -- "I'm just being neighborly, standing here close by in case you need to throw away a french fry, I'm here for ya," -- that kind of thing. I drew a circle in the sand around the blanket and told the gulls to stay behind it, which tickled DB to watch them inch up to it ... and, to our surprise, not cross it! Which elicited much laughter on both our parts.
And then, we ran into friends we haven't seen in, like, a year, and spent an hour or so with them, closer to the water. DB built a sand castle, we told a story about the miniature king and queen (and all the princes and princesses and ladies in waiting and knights and cooks and butlers) who lived there. He LOVED telling a story with a REAL prop right in front of us. LOVED it.
So, all in all, a great afternoon. Just 3 hours, we never even put our swimsuits on, and it didn't matter.
Part 2.
I had such a good time with him that I wanted to go again on the weekend. So we went back on Sunday, with Husband too, good sport that he is to brave the area's most popular state park on a holiday weekend afternoon. It wasn't overly crowded, but the parking lot was full for the beach we'd gone to on Friday so we chose another, with a much further walk to the water.
Well.
As soon as we arrived, DB started to ask when we could get nuggets and fries. Now, Husband and I have had.it.up.to.here with this kid's proclivity to eat tiny bits of food at mealtimes and then be Insistently.Hungry.Again in, like, 2 hours. So we weren't in the mood to pay to feed him when we'd just eaten lunch an hour before. He couldn't have been THAT hungry. I figured it was more his trying to recreate the routine from Friday.
Since the concession/showers building was far from the water, we needed to put our suits on before spreading out the blanket and settling down. Well, he didn't want to put on his suit. Poor Husband had to deal with that one. Didn't help anyone's mood.
Once that was accomplished, we headed across the sand. He wanted to pick a spot right near the building (partly repeating the routine, partly he hates to walk.) Husband and I wanted to go in the water, so we made him trudge. Whine, moan, complain, can we get Friendly's. Can we get Friendly's.
It was a far enough walk that we weren't looking forward to making a special trip back up to the building just to get him the food, especially since we still didn't think he was THAT hungry, so we said we'd get it LATER.
Oh, geez. Too vague. Whine, whine, whiiiiiiiine; it was so bad that Husband and I jointly stopped more than once and contemplated going right back home. (We're rarely on the same page like that, so that was actually good for our relationship, though we'd of course rather not have been having to deal with it at all!)
We told DB, and reminded him it would NOT be fun-n-games with Mommy at home, or relaxin'-with-the-TV; he'd be in his room, alone. So he had to pick. He did his best to complain less.
So, finally, we get near to the water and get the blanket set up, and his sand castle building stuff, which he was looking foward to on the ride out. And he's STILL asking about those d*mn nuggets and fries!
Then Husband went in the water and pronounced it cold. OK, so he went in a little later, and I coax DB down to the water's edge (he only walks on the sand with his Crocs on, mind you). I tell him he just has to get his feet wet, he's whining and complaining about that. I tell him no nuggets and fries unless he gets his feet wet. He still is close to freaking out.
Finally his feet get wet, it's not sooo bad, then we tell him he can stand or sit on the edge while Husband and I go in just a little. Like, literally, not even up to my waist. I just wanted part of me in the water, so I could tolerate his fuss, fuss, fuss by the seaside. Fine, whatever.
Then, suddenly, he's screaming; there were flies on the water's edge and he got bit, since, duh, he's standing still! I know I should be more sympathetic but I just am not. *Sigh.*
Anyway, that got us out of the water and back to the blanket, where not only does he want to drink my lemonade instead of his specially-picked root beer, but he also wants to sit.on.my.lap.
Yes, the child will turn 6 years old tomorrow, and he wants to sit on my flippin' lap at the beach. Husband nixed that for me, which I appreciated since I don't know how to say no.
And again he's asking about the nuggets and fries. We finally had to use our standard ultimatum, which is: "We know you want them. You know we're going to take care of you. So if you ask about it again, you don't get it." And we got out the Pringles, which helped too.
So then he settled down a bit and directed me on making a sand castle for him. (This is a running joke with Husband now, that DB is the Executive and I am the Do-er; like this morning DB said, "Let's tell a story about a car, it's his first day of first grade but he is scared. Not like me, I am not scared." And then he sits back and expects me to tell the tale.)
And so, I made a sand castle. He turned out to be interested in the sand underwater at the bottom of the pail, and the bits of shells and whatever we could find to float in the water; "a miniature beach!" he called it.
So, OK, he's interested in something beach related, I'm happy.
And, since the sun was bright and we didn't know about the umbrella rentals back at the building until after we'd trekked to the water, we didn't stay too long, us with our Germanic-Scottish pale pink skin.
He was good about not being able to take the "miniature beach" with us, pouring it out when we left. After much discussion, he also seemed to like stepping on the day's sand castle; Friday's we had left as-is. (So it was just as well we didn't return to the same beach to find it gone!)
Finally, finally, he got his nuggets and fries, and didn't even complain about standing in line with me for it. He was happy to eat it on the way home -- even suggested that himself -- and ate a good amount of it, too.
But geez, Husband and I were pretty emotionally drained!
On the upside, though, we Got To The Beach As a Family Once. And the day after, sounds like the water was closed and even some of the parking lots at Jones Beach, due to tropical-storm related high tides. So we went on the right day, for Husband and me anyway!
