How Do YOU Know It's Fall?

For me it's not a date on the calendar, or back-to-school, or colored leaves.

All those things are duly noted, of course, but what really tells ME fall has arrived is my skin.

I can go weeks during the summer months without putting on my Oil of Olay face cream, and all summer long I only truly need to moisturize the rest of me when I shave my legs or have been in a pool or ocean.

But then comes a day in mid- to late-September when, suddenly, I feel a slight tightening on my face after my shower. Time to moisturize.

Time for fall.

What's your harbinger of fall?

The Clean Hands Song

You know how the schools all tell the kids,
"You should wash your hands for as long as it takes to sing the alphabet or Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star, through twice?

Well, why don't we teach them a song to sing about what they are doing instead?

Goodbye, goodbye, little germs,
How I want to make you squirm!
Send you down the drain so quick
So you will not make me sick,
Goodbye, goodbye, little germs,
How I want to make you squirm!

Goodbye, goodbye, little germs,
How I want to make you squirm!
Though you are too small to see,
Soap and water make you flee,
Goodbye, goodbye, little germs,
How I want to make you squirm!

Haiku Friday: Love Note to Poets

I enjoy haiku,
but I like all of you more --
you inspire my week!

Love getting to know
little bits about each one
from shared words and pix

Should we spread the word
and get more poets to join?
Meanwhile, carry on!

Would you like to haiku today?
To participate in Haiku Friday, just follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. It or they can be part or all of your post, but your post must include a haiku. What's a haiku, you ask? Hint: 5-7-5. More info: Click here. Or here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON'T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Please leave a comment after linking, thanks! (Eventually the Mr Linky links go away, I think, so they only way we'll find you in the future is via your comment.)

4. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top of this post.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will carry on the esteemed tradition of deleting any links without haiku!

Thrifty Birthday Party Budget

We had a great party for DuckyBoy's 7th birthday. As some of you know, we are living fairly comfortably this year off last year's excess income (the Lord DOES provide), but are trying not to be extravagant since simply living in NYC is an extravagance itself.

So, we set a budget of $200 for this year's birthday party.

It helped that DB got into his head to "only invite 8 kids," I think because he saw that the birthday paper products come in 8-packs. So, despite my usual inclination to invite more, more more, I invited 8, and didn't even invite more when I got a couple of no's.

So, we ended up with 7 kids, including DB. It was plenty.

We always invite parents, too, 'cause no way am I crazy enough to have a drop-off party, and most of my friends are Nest parents anyway and they aren't ready to drop their kids off anyway. So we feed the adults too, which some people might not do. So there were 8 adults who ate dinner.

And, in true Poverty Party fashion, here are the actual expenses:

Cake: $23
This included a Transformers cake-topper toy DB had been eagerly awaiting. It's a bit of a dud because It.Will.Not.Stand when properly transformed, but there's a priceless lesson right there.

Beverage total: $36
Beer (plus bottle deposits): $18
Soda (plus bottle deposits): $13
Ice for the cooler: $5

I splurged on beer we like, Stella Artois and Blue Moon, and on the little 100-calorie cans of soda 'cause they're cute and Husband likes them.

Food total: $73
5 lbs beef brisket: $25
Other food: around $48

I got buns from a local bakery outlet, BOGO potato chips, and a few veggies from our weekly CSA box, which all helped. And we have a bunch of stuff left over -- buns, bbq brisket, veggies, and a whole $7 package of nuggets -- so some of this can roll over to the grocery budget, right?

Paper goods: $25
I got both sizes of plates and both sizes of napkin, plus extra 99-cent plates in case we needed more. I could have returned one pack of big plates abnd a pack of big napkins, if I hadn't opened them already. Could still return $1.98 of plain plates, but is it worth the gas? Anyway I'll use the napkins for his mini-party at school.

I didn't buy a Transformers tablecloth; I had one with the right colors (red and blue) so I used that. Also, I decorated with a couple of printouts of the page I scanned to make his t-shirt, and also with drawings of Optimus Prime cut from gummy boxes (I've been saving them for this). Oh, we did buy one poster for $2 (half the price we'd seen weeks earlier at the same place!)

I made a $4 impulse splurge on little popcorn boxes so the kids could have popcorn while they watched the cartoon on the big TV. Those were SO worth it. Could have skipped the $14 worth of nuggets, in fact, since we let them snack first...

Games and prizes: $25
Um, we didn't play any of the games I planned. DB has a lot of toys, and after they watched a Soundwave episode of Transformers Animated, they colored these paper guitars I have left over from a splurge order of misc. nonsense years ago from Oriental Trading, and they played with those.

Soooo, we didn't hand out any of the prizes. Well, we had one $3 ring we dubbed the Allspark ring (it's a blue square), which we gave DB's girlfriend 'cause she was the last one there. (Her mom said, "Is this an engagement ring?!")

But DuckyBoy already knows about the prizes, so I don't think I can return them (except $3 worth and again, worth returning? hardly). I'm hoping to save them for rewards for the school year -- a week of completed homework or of no reports of yelling, stuff like that.

Favors: $27 + $10 = $37

I made favors for 10, and here's why. Two of DB's friends each have 2 younger sisters. I didn't know if one set was coming, and knew only one of the other set was coming, but didn't want the sister-who-couldn't-come to feel left out. 'Cause I like her. Now, they're younger, and they're girls, so I thought they might prefer something other than Transformers stuff, so for those 4 girls I got some different stuff. About $10 worth of stuff. Would do it the same next time.

My friend on LI had her son's favors in brown paper bags, which made me want to save those few bucks too. So we gave DB the choice -- Transformer goody bags, OR he could have the $ they would have cost (which was like $8 since I'd have needed 2 sets!). He chose the money, so all I spent was $1 on ribbon to tie the bags shut. (I folded the top over and punch2 holes, then tied each bag shut and put the name on. I think they looked nice.

6 favor boxes had: Transformers coloring book with mini markers, bubbles, package of gummies, and an Allspark cube.
4 had: Tiny purple notebook, Pez dispenser (shh! don't tell DB!), gummies, bubbles, and 2 got a coloring book and 2 got an Allspark.

Other: $54

• About $20 for a plain T-shirt and iron-on transfer paper, which I had to buy twice (long story).
• $4 for a special birthday-boy ribbon to put on his shirt. Which we forgot to put on him, but he'd worn it the day we got it and got the use out of it. Maybe we'll reuse it for the class party.
• $30 for babysitter. I expected more siblings who'd have needed wrangling. Even though the group of kids was smaller, she was still a big help. Plus I just liked having her around.
  

Grand total: $286.

• About $15 of the prizes, I will use for rewards.
• At least $25 worth of food and beverages was left over.
• He'll wear his custom $20 t-shirt all year long.
  
• $5 of paper goods will go toward his school party, for which I'd have to buy something anyway (and still need to come up with other favors for).

So that's $65 worth that, with some creative accounting, can get lopped off, meaning I can think of my party expense as: $221.

Since we spent cash we'd been saving from our weekly budget, Husband says it seems like it was free.

But he also said that for what we did, a low-key home party, it seemed like it should have only cost $50. Next year he can do more of the shopping!

Relationship Poem: Asking for What I Want

It Used To Be Enough...

The thought that he
found me sexy
used to be enough

His passion fueled my passion,
any touch was welcome

Now the touch is the same
but the skin is thin

the differences hang
in the air
over me

I regret never asking,
not ever really thinking about,
what would feel best to me

for now so much time has gone by

not a lie, really,
more a miscalculation
of what it means
to be with someone


* * * * * * * * * *
I wrote this awhile ago (like, within the past year)
and just found the slip of paper.
Don't feel like this so much right now,
but I didn't want to lose it.

It's true that I do have trouble asking for what I want
and sharing what I like and what makes me feel good
both in and out of bed.

I'm getting better at it.

Political Quote

I'm not turning into a political blogger, and these days my politics are somewhat in question anyhow, but I heard someone say this on NY1 this morning. I thought I'd be able to find out more about who said it and what show, but I can't seem to -- looks like it was maybe someone from the NY Times so they don't let NY1 have the online rights to that show or something. Anyway, here's the quote:

"There is no God-given right for any organization to receive a grant from the United States government."

I think it says a lot about our country that a statement like that even needs to be made.

Haiku Friday: The Pain of Being 7

Frustration rises,
spills over into tears, a
scream from the backseat.

"I've been there," I say.
"What do you mean?" he says, shocked
I could get his pain.

"It was a long day,"
I say in a soothing voice.
"Sometimes school is rough."

"Let it out," I say.
One more strangled scream bursts forth,
then there is silence.

This has been the first full week of school, and the first week of DuckyBoy's long-awaited (on his end!) experience of going to After-School. For the most part he's happy to be there, to have free time time to talk to and play with and just be with the kids he likes.

But it makes for a long day; he gets on the bus at 7 am and I picked him up between 5 and 5:30.

And, a couple days ago he got teased at school, then yesterday he retaliated and he's the one that got into trouble (rightly so -- but a tough lesson for him to learn, literally; he does not understand the ramifications of his actions on the other student).

And so, there we were in the car, and out came a scream. And I didn't yell at him. He was so surprised. It was one of those moments where you think, "I hope that helps him in the long run, because it seemed like the right thing to do and say..."

And now, I'd like to apologize for haiku'ing about parenthood so much! This is not Haiku Parenting Friday! It's for everyone!

Would you like to haiku today? To participate in Haiku Friday, just follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. It or they can be part or all of your post, but your post must include a haiku. What's a haiku, you ask? Hint: 5-7-5. More info: Click here. Or here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON'T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Please leave a comment after linking, thanks! (Eventually the Mr Linky links go away, I think, so they only way we'll find you in the future is via your comment.)

4. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top of this post.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will carry on the esteemed tradition of deleting any links without haiku!

Cool Music on Tour: Elvis Plays Sitar

If you're in Texas, Chicago, or in between this fall, consider attending an Aradhna concert (check their website for the tour dates).

Aradhna plays music I'd never, from the description I got, have thought I'd like: Indian sitar music.

Now, I've heard Indian music. To my ear it can be whiny sometimes.

But this is a white guy with American influences in his head playing it -- and to me it comes out like, Elvis plays sitar.

We were blessed to have Chris and Pete stay with us during a NY stay a couple years ago, and after we heard their sound we were so sorry we'd skipped the concert!!

Pete, DuckyBoy, and Chris in NYC 2007

Do these look like the nicest guys in the whole world or what? They are. (Well, except maybe for that one in the middle. We're working on that.)

They are committed to playing Christian music in a style that can reach a largely non-Christian population, which is also way cool. Looks like Pete will not be on the tour but I'm sure Chris, who is the sitarist, will be surrounded by with other wonderful musicians.

Princesses on the Brain

After we filled in as much of our Transformers alphabet as we could last weekend, DuckyBoy told me I had to write my own "Alphabet of Princesses" since I am the girl.

At first I thought, There aren't that many Disney princesses yet... but then I thought, It's not such a bad idea. The Disney helpless lasses could be mixed in a book with real-life strong women, like Queen Elizabeth (both of 'em) and Princess Di, who had a fairy-tale life to some extent but found strength to follow her own pursuits.

My approach to learning is to meet the kids where they're at -- DB and I have been translating Bible stories into Transformer stories lately, and boy did the Good Samaritan rock his world!) -- so it might give the K and 1st grade girls something a little more substantial to read, a little non-fiction princess action!

Then a few days ago I got a Tweet from @AmandaSteinberg with a USA Today blog post called "The Princess Problem," talking about how too much Princess might, and this is just one blogger's opinion now, and I'm paraphrasing, make young women more passive about our lives instead of expecting to take charge of our own destiny.

Interesting. I think a non-fiction, easy-reader book could help with that! (Am I writing a blog post here or a query?)

Plus all the little-girl modern princesses could be mentioned too, 'cause it's kinda neat that there still are princesses in the world.

Anybody have a favorite historical princess they'd like featured?

The Truth About Elvis!

I apologize for all the edging marks -- I'm not so great with Illustrator yet...

Recently DuckyBoy and I stumbled across a whole galaxy's worth of YouTube videos reviewing various Transformer Toys.

One of our favorite reviewers is SeanxLong. His humorous asides have sparked several interesting conversations between DB and me:

DB: "Why does he have the Autobots talk about looking for girls a lot?"

Me: "Because he's a young man, and that's what young guys do and think about."

But! When we watched Sean's 100th-video special, we found out a secret! Learn what really happened to Elvis at about 2 mins: 30 secs into the video ...



The story of how Grimlock and the DinoBots come to be was just on this morning. I don't get to see much while DB watches it before school, so I actually watched it myself while I had my coffee after DB got on the bus!

Fortunately I haven't had to tell DB what "beyatches" means yet. Can you watch the language, Jazz? Thanks!

Haiku Friday: 8 Years Ago Today

I'll never forget.
When the first tower was hit
I was on the street,

My street in Brooklyn,
Watching workmen gaze skyward
(But just one or two)

Got on the subway
oblivious to the drama
just two stops away

A woman got on
sat down and started to cry,
"People were jumping..."

Knew something was wrong
When a suit and a workman
Were talking as peers ...

At Grand Central Sta.
I got off with the woman
to find her her train --

Me, concerned for her;
She, close to hysterical;
then I go to work

We look out windows
And try to call our loved ones
a few blocks away

Finally reach Husband,
then I walk to his office
just across midtown

As I cross Fifth Ave.
All stand still and look downtown --
And a tower falls.

Fireman Vinnie Kane,
a friend of a friend of mine,
may you rest in peace.

I wasn't sure 9/11 would lend itself to haiku, nor did I know what I was going to haiku about until I realized Friday's date. It was a sad day to live in New York City. And freaky to realize that I was on one of the subway lines that went right under the Twin Towers, about an hour before the towers fell.

I was so afraid my friend Nancy was in the towers. She lived downtown and I couldn't reach her until the next day. She has a story of her own of that day, and of the aftermath, but I am grateful she was OK.

There's some controversy this year about whether or not every network needs to carry the reading of every name. I think an effort should be made to make sure at least one major network carries the reading of the names each year, but otherwise it is up to those of us who know the names and remember the day and the people to make sure their sacrifice is not forgotten.

Would you like to haiku today? To participate in Haiku Friday, just follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. It or they can be part or all of your post, but your post must include a haiku. What's a haiku, you ask? Hint: 5-7-5. More info: Click here. Or here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON'T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Please leave a comment after linking, thanks! (Eventually the Mr Linky links go away, I think, so they only way we'll find you in the future is via your comment.)

4. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top of this post.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will carry on the esteemed tradition of deleting any links without haiku!

Organic Beats Technology (Again)

How funny is this story about the pigeon who beat the Internet? Anyone who's waited for a download or a heavy-laden site to come up will appreciate it.

You know what it reminds me of, the story of hammer-swinger John Henry beating the steam driver. We listen to the Johnny Cash version of that story all the time.

DuckyBoy loves to say he'd root for the steam driver. And he'd much rather be a Transformer than a human. This'll really break his heart! LOL

The Great Tomato Soup Saga of 2009

Yesterday for lunch DuckyBoy acquiesced to eating tomato soup with Goldfish crackers and some cheesy munchie mix.

We began with the tomato soup mug about half-full, because I know he never eats too much of the soup itself.

He ate most of the crackers and a tiny bit of soup and then announced he was full.

I let him take a break, then told him he had to finish the soup.

Oh, the wailing and gnashing of teeth that ensued!

I put it in the subway-map mug. It was full but it's much smaller, so it looked like less.

Relieved that it was less than he thought, he agreed to eat/drink more while I read to him.

The book finished, he'd had the rest of the crackers and about a third of what was in the subway cup.

"Fuulllllllllll!" he complained.

As much for me as for him, I proceeded to pour the remaining soup into a measuring cup. It was a measly quarter-cup of soup. I was not going to feel guilty about making my kid have a quarter-cup of soup That I Know He Likes.

I put my foot down: We were not going to go outside, or play (both of which he wanted to do) until that soup was gone.

Now, I never do this. Many other people do, I know, it's not a new concept to make your children clean their plates, but I tend to be more laissez faire -- when he's hungry he cleans his plate, when he's not he doesn't.

But this is ridiculous -- he agrees to soup and drinks a tablespoonful?!

So it was a real OK Corrall-style standoff. After a few moments of his fussing I finally said, "You can eat this soup or go to your room!"

Oh, that was NOT what he wanted to hear! He went in and out of his room a couple of times, then --surprise, surprise! -- managed to drink the rest of the soup.

I think the novelty of having it from the measuring cup helped.

But good grief! It takes a cabinetful of cups to feed a child ...

Website Focus: Diets in Review

Has anyone else heard of Diets in Review? Seems like a cool site, though I'd like to see more comments from visitors about the various diets -- which is why I'm putting this out there.

I found it 'cause I met Carmen at BlogHer; sent her off a guest post earlier in the week, don't know when it's going up.

But in the meantime, I did the "Diet Finder" quiz, and Weight Watchers came up as a good diet for me, even though I indicated I didn't want a support group. I did like doing WW in the past, though, so not far off.

For Husband, it came up with the Sedona Method. Now, we actually like the Sedona Method overall, but the weight-loss "program" is just using the same methodology for whatever you want --weight loss of riches or happiness. And for his parameters I input "I need strict dietary advice." Of which SM gives none, since it's not really a diet per se, more of a way of life.

So it's not perfect. I like the Diet Finder anyway. And the site.

Now if I can just channel my enthusiasm into starting to lose weight!

Haiku Friday: Spectrum Parents

Friday already?
Blame it on birthday party --
I forgot to post!!

A rare chance for friends
to relax, chat openly
about spectrum kids.

Love to do again,
maybe a monthly playdate
for Nesters and friends?

We all understand
that our kids do their own thing,
then circle back in.

Would you like to haiku today? To participate in Haiku Friday, just follow these steps:

1. Write your own haiku on your blog. You can do one or many, all following a theme or just random. It or they can be part or all of your post, but your post must include a haiku. What's a haiku, you ask? Hint: 5-7-5. More info: Click here. Or here.

2. Sign the Mister Linky below with your name and the link to your haiku post (the specific post URL, not your main blog URL). DON'T sign unless you have a haiku this week. If you need help with this, please let me know.

3. Please leave a comment after linking, thanks! (Eventually the Mr Linky links go away, I think, so they only way we'll find you in the future is via your comment.)

4. Pick up a Haiku Friday button to display on the post or in your sidebar by clicking the button at the top of this post.

REMEMBER: Do not post your link unless you have a haiku this week! I will carry on the esteemed tradition of deleting any links without haiku!

Santa Claus: Spoiler Alert!

He knows.

Just shy of 7 (birthday party tomorrow!), he knows.

He demanded I tell him the truth the other day, and I had a hard time doing it. In the car on the way home from somewhere, he told me all the reasons he doesn't think Santa is real. I kept countering with all my ideas about why he is, and we went back and forth.

Finally he mentioned Santa's penguin wrapping paper, to which I countered that I don't use penguin wrapping paper.

But I knew I had my out.

So I said, "Hmm. When we get home, I'll look around and see if I can find any evidence." So I poked about here and there and finally went to the closet where I keep the penguin wrapping paper, hidden inside another role of Christmas wrap. I pick up the outer roll and sure enough, the penguin paper slid out.

After that he pinned me down and made me say it: "There is no Santa!"Mommy Care Bear finally said it for me, but that wasn't enough. I had to say it.

And once I did, I had to say it again a few times, but overall he seems OK with it. He calls me "Santa Claus" from time to time in an accusatory voice, but overall he seems ok. Thank goodness my friend told me she'd told her spectrum son, once he figured it out, that it's fun secret that you have to keep for littler kids.

He hasn't mentioned the Christmas Elf, though. 24 presents in 24 days is too good to mess around with, I guess.